There is a saying “You Must Meet Your Maker When You Die” that has always held a certain level of gratification for me. To me this comment means that when you die you will have to atone for your actions while you were alive. So whenever anyone was snarky to me I would always think of this saying and have a little bit of satisfaction that I knew one day they would have to deal with their misdeeds.
But what exactly does it mean? My vision is that when their time comes they cross over but before they can move on there are things that need to be taken care of…red tape if you will. They have to check in and get their paperwork done. I’m a secretary so there is always paperwork. Once that is done they move on to the next phase. This is a room where you sit nice and comfortable and there are a few people there to talk with you. They will go over all the paperwork you have and make sure you understand what has happened and answer any questions you have regarding the process so far.
Once that phase is done you are then ready to start your new life on the other side. Part of starting that new life is understanding what you learned in your previous life so that you can take that knowledge with you. I also think this is the part where you are confronted with all the harm you did, because this is a lesson as well. How you treated others and reacted to the needs of others tells you a lot about yourself. The fun part of this process is that you get to see and feel exactly what you caused the other person to feel. It would not work if they just read a list to you and said “Ok, Bob on October 31, 1958 you hurt your wife’s feelings by telling her that instead of looking like an angel she looked like a whore.” Then Bob would just say “Oh my bad” and move on. But, if they said “Bob, remember back on October 31, 1958 when your wife asked your opinion about her angel costume and this was your response and a video screen appears and there you two are just as you say “You don’t look like an angel you look like a whore with wings.” You get to see her feelings on her face, her body language plus you are feeling exactly what she felt at that moment. This is going to have a huge impact on how you view the situation now. You can no longer just brush it off with a tart “Whatever” you are feeling everything you caused her to feel by your harsh and nasty comments.
I use to love the idea of those who had wronged me having to see exactly what they did. But you know that you have grown as a person when you realize that you don’t want that person to have to go through that experience. You realize that it was simply a day in your life and that you don’t want them to feel the hurt because it will not fix the pain from the past. I think this about things that have happened over my life with my family. There were some seriously painful things said to me by my mom as I was growing up. Now there is no reason in my mind for her to have to experience any of the pain she caused me. To me it is done and over with and I survived to be the strong person I am today. Unfortunately this is not your decision to make. That is up to the higher powers that be.
This is not my attitude toward 2 & 3. I want them to experience everything freaking thing they did to make my life miserable. Mainly because I wonder if you can carry over a narcissistic personality to the other side? Both of these men took the attitude that they could say what they wanted to me, if I did not take it the way they meant it that was my problem not theirs. They did not care if they hurt me or upset me. Because in their mind they could say whatever they wanted because it was who they were and they had that right.
Sure you can say what you want at anytime, it is called Freedom of Speech as Americans we are allowed this by law. But as spiritual beings we are not. You have to take responsibility for your actions and words. If you say “you look great today” and the person is happy with that you take the credit and move on. But, if you say “Damn you look fat today” and the person is hurt and upset, it is now your responsibility to take the credit for your comment and either apologize or explain the comment. You don’t get to say “Well I didn’t mean you look fat in a bad way. You look fat in a good way. There don’t you feel better now?” Life doesn’t work that way.
I want to be a fly on the wall when 2 & 3 are getting their review of life. I want to see the reaction when they are faced with all the horrible, hateful, hurtful things they said to me when we were divorcing. I want to know if they will be able to accept how wrong and awful they were or if they will not get the lesson and be sent back to do it again? I know I am not the only person in their lives that they have treated this way so there are others who probably feel the same way as I do. And, to clarify I am positive there are going to be things I will face when I cross over and things I will not be proud of doing and saying. But, I think I will be able to handle those and learn from what I did. Of course, I don’t usually tell people exactly what I think of them and when I don’t like someone I try to stay away from them instead of use them personal gain so that I can get what I want out of them then dump them like yesterdays newspaper with the crossword puzzle done.
Oh to be a fly on the wall in the afterlife.
But what exactly does it mean? My vision is that when their time comes they cross over but before they can move on there are things that need to be taken care of…red tape if you will. They have to check in and get their paperwork done. I’m a secretary so there is always paperwork. Once that is done they move on to the next phase. This is a room where you sit nice and comfortable and there are a few people there to talk with you. They will go over all the paperwork you have and make sure you understand what has happened and answer any questions you have regarding the process so far.
Once that phase is done you are then ready to start your new life on the other side. Part of starting that new life is understanding what you learned in your previous life so that you can take that knowledge with you. I also think this is the part where you are confronted with all the harm you did, because this is a lesson as well. How you treated others and reacted to the needs of others tells you a lot about yourself. The fun part of this process is that you get to see and feel exactly what you caused the other person to feel. It would not work if they just read a list to you and said “Ok, Bob on October 31, 1958 you hurt your wife’s feelings by telling her that instead of looking like an angel she looked like a whore.” Then Bob would just say “Oh my bad” and move on. But, if they said “Bob, remember back on October 31, 1958 when your wife asked your opinion about her angel costume and this was your response and a video screen appears and there you two are just as you say “You don’t look like an angel you look like a whore with wings.” You get to see her feelings on her face, her body language plus you are feeling exactly what she felt at that moment. This is going to have a huge impact on how you view the situation now. You can no longer just brush it off with a tart “Whatever” you are feeling everything you caused her to feel by your harsh and nasty comments.
I use to love the idea of those who had wronged me having to see exactly what they did. But you know that you have grown as a person when you realize that you don’t want that person to have to go through that experience. You realize that it was simply a day in your life and that you don’t want them to feel the hurt because it will not fix the pain from the past. I think this about things that have happened over my life with my family. There were some seriously painful things said to me by my mom as I was growing up. Now there is no reason in my mind for her to have to experience any of the pain she caused me. To me it is done and over with and I survived to be the strong person I am today. Unfortunately this is not your decision to make. That is up to the higher powers that be.
This is not my attitude toward 2 & 3. I want them to experience everything freaking thing they did to make my life miserable. Mainly because I wonder if you can carry over a narcissistic personality to the other side? Both of these men took the attitude that they could say what they wanted to me, if I did not take it the way they meant it that was my problem not theirs. They did not care if they hurt me or upset me. Because in their mind they could say whatever they wanted because it was who they were and they had that right.
Sure you can say what you want at anytime, it is called Freedom of Speech as Americans we are allowed this by law. But as spiritual beings we are not. You have to take responsibility for your actions and words. If you say “you look great today” and the person is happy with that you take the credit and move on. But, if you say “Damn you look fat today” and the person is hurt and upset, it is now your responsibility to take the credit for your comment and either apologize or explain the comment. You don’t get to say “Well I didn’t mean you look fat in a bad way. You look fat in a good way. There don’t you feel better now?” Life doesn’t work that way.
I want to be a fly on the wall when 2 & 3 are getting their review of life. I want to see the reaction when they are faced with all the horrible, hateful, hurtful things they said to me when we were divorcing. I want to know if they will be able to accept how wrong and awful they were or if they will not get the lesson and be sent back to do it again? I know I am not the only person in their lives that they have treated this way so there are others who probably feel the same way as I do. And, to clarify I am positive there are going to be things I will face when I cross over and things I will not be proud of doing and saying. But, I think I will be able to handle those and learn from what I did. Of course, I don’t usually tell people exactly what I think of them and when I don’t like someone I try to stay away from them instead of use them personal gain so that I can get what I want out of them then dump them like yesterdays newspaper with the crossword puzzle done.
Oh to be a fly on the wall in the afterlife.
I can't believe that Halloween is in 4 days. It is still warm here in Albuquerque and kind of disappointing. I woke up Sunday missing everything. I missed my mom, my dad, my kid, my siblings, Texas, the beach, being home for the holidays. You name it I missed it...well not everything. There are few things and people I didn't miss but then again I don't think about them as viable things in my life anymore. But, I was just sad. Luckily, it was so freaking busy at the mortuary, my missing things got swept away to the sideline and death and dying took over.
One thing that I really miss is Halloween,growing up Halloween was always my favorite holiday. I don't really remember going trick or treating because our school held a Halloween Carnival every year so we would go there. Each classroom would be responsible for a different activity or game and you won prizes and candy and all the fun stuff you get on Halloween.
When Joshua was little we would take him, Eric, Casey and Debra out trick or treating in the neighborhood and we always had so much fun. I remember Joshua's first costume was a dragon he was 6 weeks old and not real happy to be dressed up but it was fun. After that he was a clown, a dog, Cousin It (my favorite),oscar the grouch, batman several times, and then he got big enough to do his own costume and it was always something scary. Good Times. Some Halloweens would be freezing and his costume would be covered by a coat other Halloweens it would be 90 degrees outside and he was sweltering in his costume. The last Halloween Joshua and I had together he was in 8th grade and we lived in Tucson. We spent an entire day looking for the perfect pieces to his costume and then hit the neighborhood to trick or treat.After that he moved to Wyoming and most holidays no longer mattered to me. I usually spent them doing something ghost hunting related but it was never the same.
This year I will be working, last year I was on the road planning suicide so life seems to have taken a turn for the better for me. Thank God.
One thing that I really miss is Halloween,growing up Halloween was always my favorite holiday. I don't really remember going trick or treating because our school held a Halloween Carnival every year so we would go there. Each classroom would be responsible for a different activity or game and you won prizes and candy and all the fun stuff you get on Halloween.
When Joshua was little we would take him, Eric, Casey and Debra out trick or treating in the neighborhood and we always had so much fun. I remember Joshua's first costume was a dragon he was 6 weeks old and not real happy to be dressed up but it was fun. After that he was a clown, a dog, Cousin It (my favorite),oscar the grouch, batman several times, and then he got big enough to do his own costume and it was always something scary. Good Times. Some Halloweens would be freezing and his costume would be covered by a coat other Halloweens it would be 90 degrees outside and he was sweltering in his costume. The last Halloween Joshua and I had together he was in 8th grade and we lived in Tucson. We spent an entire day looking for the perfect pieces to his costume and then hit the neighborhood to trick or treat.After that he moved to Wyoming and most holidays no longer mattered to me. I usually spent them doing something ghost hunting related but it was never the same.
This year I will be working, last year I was on the road planning suicide so life seems to have taken a turn for the better for me. Thank God.
So maybe this is why I am wanting to argue with anyone standing still long enough.
I went to the library over the weekend with Phyllis and while I was there I was reading a book on gerbils. I have the one gerbil, Tommy, who I just adore. He is the greatest neurotic little fellow. I only want what is best for my Tommy. So imagine my shock and horror when I realized that gerbils live in colonies not alone. Unlike hamsters and more like guinea pigs they need a partner in order to be happy. So my week has revolved around work and trying to figure out how to make Tommy happy.
I went to my source of information for all things gerbil, The American Gerbil Society, yes I am a member. I am also a member of The Guinea Pig Society, but that is enough about my amazing social life. I asked about my loner gerbil and was given instructions on how to find him a friend. Since he is an adult they highly suggested getting a baby male gerbil for him. Apparently if all things go well then Tommy will turn into a father figure for the baby gerbil and they will live in happy gerbil heaven. Easy instructions right? WRONG.
Do you know how difficult it is to find a baby gerbil? You would think that all you had to do was post an ad on craigslist for one right? WRONG. It is against the policy of craigslist to buy and sell animals. You can "adopt" them and charge an "adoption fee" but you can not sell or offer to buy an animal. Okay, fine so I put an ad up there just looking for one without any offer of paying. Well that goes against their policy of "e-begging". I kid you not. So my next outlet was to find a breeder, again not an easy task. Most of the breeders listed with the AGS either no longer have a working website or do not respond to emails. I have resorted to looking for a breeder anywhere in the US that has a baby gerbil and will ship it to me.
My life has gone from career oriented person to you rodent oriented person. I have spent untold amounts of time looking for a baby gerbil from a breeder somewhere in the continental United States in hopes they will ship me at gerbil that will cost probably $3-$5 for the animal and $25-$40 to have him shipped here. All because I took in an unwanted neglected gerbil and now I want him to have the best life possible.
I think I need to look at having another kid so I can focus my time and attention and brain matter on something more significant than rodents or find someone to have hot sex with. Either way it will not revolve around rodents of any kind. And just to be clear I would much rather have the hot sex than the kid. In case anyone was wanting to offer to help me with my problem.
I went to the library over the weekend with Phyllis and while I was there I was reading a book on gerbils. I have the one gerbil, Tommy, who I just adore. He is the greatest neurotic little fellow. I only want what is best for my Tommy. So imagine my shock and horror when I realized that gerbils live in colonies not alone. Unlike hamsters and more like guinea pigs they need a partner in order to be happy. So my week has revolved around work and trying to figure out how to make Tommy happy.
I went to my source of information for all things gerbil, The American Gerbil Society, yes I am a member. I am also a member of The Guinea Pig Society, but that is enough about my amazing social life. I asked about my loner gerbil and was given instructions on how to find him a friend. Since he is an adult they highly suggested getting a baby male gerbil for him. Apparently if all things go well then Tommy will turn into a father figure for the baby gerbil and they will live in happy gerbil heaven. Easy instructions right? WRONG.
Do you know how difficult it is to find a baby gerbil? You would think that all you had to do was post an ad on craigslist for one right? WRONG. It is against the policy of craigslist to buy and sell animals. You can "adopt" them and charge an "adoption fee" but you can not sell or offer to buy an animal. Okay, fine so I put an ad up there just looking for one without any offer of paying. Well that goes against their policy of "e-begging". I kid you not. So my next outlet was to find a breeder, again not an easy task. Most of the breeders listed with the AGS either no longer have a working website or do not respond to emails. I have resorted to looking for a breeder anywhere in the US that has a baby gerbil and will ship it to me.
My life has gone from career oriented person to you rodent oriented person. I have spent untold amounts of time looking for a baby gerbil from a breeder somewhere in the continental United States in hopes they will ship me at gerbil that will cost probably $3-$5 for the animal and $25-$40 to have him shipped here. All because I took in an unwanted neglected gerbil and now I want him to have the best life possible.
I think I need to look at having another kid so I can focus my time and attention and brain matter on something more significant than rodents or find someone to have hot sex with. Either way it will not revolve around rodents of any kind. And just to be clear I would much rather have the hot sex than the kid. In case anyone was wanting to offer to help me with my problem.
I don't know what it is but this week all I have felt like doing is fight and argue with people. It has gotten so bad that I have avoided talking to people just so I won't argue with them. I would like to blame it on the full moon but it was last week. Although, it is the Hunters Moon which explains my need to be agressive, sort of .
I could blame it on PMS but since I am single and have no man in my life I don't even keep up with the "M" of PMS. I could not tell you if I have one or not, because when you don't have to worry about it you don't pay attention to it. It simply becomes one more chore in a day full of chores.
So I am not sure what is causing my mood. I did have a fleeting thought that if I was an executioner death row would be empty at the moment. I would have been on a killing spree, cleaning up the big house. I am sure everyone on death row just heaved a big sigh of relief.
I am enjoying the cooler weather, it is finally starting to feel like fall. I wake up in the morning and it is literally 60 degrees or less in my house. Usually because I have the doors open and it has been getting below freezing the last two nights. I have started Christmas Shopping with a vengence that is always a fun task for me. It could be because my trip to Sedona next weekend is not happening, due to staff changes at the funeral home. I started out my fall season wanting time off and now it is back into working all the time. Let's pray they find someone soon or I may just go nuts.
Once in awhile, some sad person will come along and find my blog. Then they feel that it is their right to make negative comments on how I am choosing to live my life. So instead of being offended by his extremely negative comments I decided to turn the tables a bit and let’s look at what he had to say.
Let me start off by saying this came by way of the “comment” link on the blog. The person who sent this email was Chad. Chad was not man enough to use his actual email or leave any forwarding information. Why? Because that would mean that he is able to take what he dishes out. That would mean that his balls are hanging between his legs versus shriveled up in his ass where apparently his brain resides as well.
You're a piece of work. You might just want to stay single and spare some poor fool the trouble. Or, clone yourself, because that is obviously what you're most interested in. There will never be a man out there that is totally interested in what you are interested in and visa versa. Relationships are about sacrifice and comprimise (sp)? These words or actions don't seem to be anything that you're interested in. I suggest just staying with the dogs. They don't talk back, have opinions and do just about whatever you want them to do. Pet spoilers are usually the typical narcicist (sp, once again)?. All you have to do is give a dog a treat and scratch it's neck and it will do anything you want. The man from the dating site wrote a very sincere and seemingly honest portrail of himself, no BS, just quick, polite profile. It seems you like the game playing and guessing games. #3, I assume, means you haven't done too well with relationships in the past.
I'm with an emotionally selfish, self centered person and cater to her needs the best I can. She has been very good to me in other ways. Hence the sacrifice. I'm not miserable, and she seems happy to be rubbed, emotionally spoiled and agreed with. This is probably the best relationship I've ever had and it came from learning how to do something for someone that I didn't want to do. To watch movies I didn't want, to say I like a food that I don't. She does many things for me that she doesn't want to do. Boosts my manly ego when she really doesn't care that I fixed an old broken down lawn mower or caught a big fish. It seems to work and I love her and have learned to love doing things for someone that I don't really want to do. That's love.
This is his comment that he left. Let’s start with the first sentence shall we.
1. You're a piece of work. = Wow! Doesn't know me but already recognizes an amazing piece of art work.
Let me start off by saying this came by way of the “comment” link on the blog. The person who sent this email was Chad. Chad was not man enough to use his actual email or leave any forwarding information. Why? Because that would mean that he is able to take what he dishes out. That would mean that his balls are hanging between his legs versus shriveled up in his ass where apparently his brain resides as well.
You're a piece of work. You might just want to stay single and spare some poor fool the trouble. Or, clone yourself, because that is obviously what you're most interested in. There will never be a man out there that is totally interested in what you are interested in and visa versa. Relationships are about sacrifice and comprimise (sp)? These words or actions don't seem to be anything that you're interested in. I suggest just staying with the dogs. They don't talk back, have opinions and do just about whatever you want them to do. Pet spoilers are usually the typical narcicist (sp, once again)?. All you have to do is give a dog a treat and scratch it's neck and it will do anything you want. The man from the dating site wrote a very sincere and seemingly honest portrail of himself, no BS, just quick, polite profile. It seems you like the game playing and guessing games. #3, I assume, means you haven't done too well with relationships in the past.
I'm with an emotionally selfish, self centered person and cater to her needs the best I can. She has been very good to me in other ways. Hence the sacrifice. I'm not miserable, and she seems happy to be rubbed, emotionally spoiled and agreed with. This is probably the best relationship I've ever had and it came from learning how to do something for someone that I didn't want to do. To watch movies I didn't want, to say I like a food that I don't. She does many things for me that she doesn't want to do. Boosts my manly ego when she really doesn't care that I fixed an old broken down lawn mower or caught a big fish. It seems to work and I love her and have learned to love doing things for someone that I don't really want to do. That's love.
This is his comment that he left. Let’s start with the first sentence shall we.
1. You're a piece of work. = Wow! Doesn't know me but already recognizes an amazing piece of art work.
2. You might just want to stay single and spare some poor fool the trouble. = Trust me if the man is a fool I plan to spare him the trouble and stay away from him. So the fools out there have no worries about me taking over their world.
3. Or, clone yourself, because that is obviously what you're most interested in. = This would be a dream come true. If I could clone myself I would be a very happy Cindy indeed.
4. There will never be a man out there that is totally interested in what you are interested in and visa versa. Relationships are about sacrifice and comprimise (sp)? = Okay, first off spell check is there for a reason. Use it. 2nd I don’t want someone interested in only what I am interested in. But I have done the “nothing in common” relationship and no matter how much you sacrifice if does not work.
5. These words or actions don't seem to be anything that you're interested in. I suggest just staying with the dogs.. = Thanks, Chad, I plan on staying with my dogs. Unlike the millions of uncaring people like yourself (no offense, Chad) who dump their pets when they get bored with them. Mine will be with me until their life ends. My favorite part of this comments
6. They don't talk back, have opinions and do just about whatever you want them to do. Pet spoilers are usually the typical narcicist (sp, once again)? = This really tells me Chad has no idea about me or he would know that Tau and Kali do talk back and there has never been a day in their lives where they did whatever I wanted them to. That is the funniest comment I have ever read. Really, he should witness Tau, stomping his foot on the coffee table because he wants a cookie. Once again, spell check, experience the difference. But I totally agree I am the most narcissistic person you will ever met. I have never lied about it or hinted to anything else.
7. The man from the dating site wrote a very sincere and seemingly honest portrail of himself, no BS, just quick, polite profile. It seems you like the game playing and guessing games. #3, I assume, means you haven't done too well with relationships in the past. = The man from the dating site was an idiot. He was not sincere he was needy. There is absolutely no guessing to what I want. I wrote it out in black and white. But since Chad can’t spell my guess is he can’t read well either. Why does he assume I have not done well in relationships? Again, read a little and you will see that “have not done well” is an understatement. BTW, they have this great learning tool for kids called “Hooked on Phonics” it can help with your reading and spelling issues. If that does not work, Leap Frog has some adorable stuffed animals I buy for my toddler nephews that can teach you how to recognize the alphabet.
8. I'm with an emotionally selfish, self centered person and cater to her needs the best I can. She has been very good to me in other ways. Hence the sacrifice. I'm not miserable, and she seems happy to be rubbed, emotionally spoiled and agreed with. This is probably the best relationship I've ever had and it came from learning how to do something for someone that I didn't want to do. To watch movies I didn't want, to say I like a food that I don't. She does many things for me that she doesn't want to do. Boosts my manly ego when she really doesn't care that I fixed an old broken down lawn mower or caught a big fish. It seems to work and I love her and have learned to love doing things for someone that I don't really want to do. That's love”
This last paragraph says SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much about his life. He is with an emotionally selfish, self centered person. So where is his happiness? He caters to her needs the best he can. Is she catering to your needs? Why not? Are you not worthy of her attention or are you afraid she is the best you can do? He does admit to not being miserable. But how the hell can you be happy “Rubbing, emotionally spoiling and agreeing with someone”? Chad, I hate to pop your bubble, sweetie but this is called emotional abuse. Your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, or whatever is abusing you by demanding you keep them happy and not reciprocating the feelings. If you think this is the best relationship you have ever had you really need to get out because they have not only emotionally abused you but mentally abused you as well. Because you think this is a perfect relationship. Why would you want to live YOUR life, watching movies you don’t like, eating food you don’t like, doing things you don’t like? That makes you a slave not a partner and Honey Pie, you are a slave. Wait, does she give you paycheck every week? What you have is not love, it is no where near love, hell it’s not even like. It’s torture. And if that is your opinion of what I need in my life, once again I will pass. I am here to tell you that I am not a servant or slave, I am the master of the servants and slaves. And one day I will find the perfect minion to rule over. You never know it could be you, you are already use to abuse and someone who is self centered and selfish. I think we could be the perfect pair. I love abusing a man more than anything, you like the abuse, I'm seeing a match made in heaven.
So there it is my friends. My first piece of hate mail. I can't tell you how excited I was to receive it. You know you are torturing the masses when you get hate mail. Next, I want a stalker. I had one for a short time but he is gone now and I need another one. Yeah Me!
I am not a big "pro" anything. I have my personal beliefs on abortion, gay marriage, and any other "anti-social" cause out there. But, those are my private opinions and I prefer to keep them to myself. I usually do not make big pleas for things such as voting. But early voting has started for the upcoming presidential election. From what I saw over the weekend the lines are going to be long. So if you can vote early do so, if you want to wait until November 4th don't forget.
There are so many issues that are important to each of us that need to be changed. This is an election that is pushing barriers in all areas of the country. We have the first African American running for President and a woman on the ballot for Vice President. If nothing else vote because they are pushing for change just by being on the ballot.
Remember you can't bitch about the state of our country if you refuse to participate in voting for officials. If you are over the age of 18 and have 1 brain cell you have no excuse for not voting. If you make the choice not to vote because you don't like either candidate that is BS there are several Presidential candidates on the ballot or at least cancel out your vote. Remember there is more to vote for than just a President. There are amendments to our constitution, judges who are up for reelection, city and state amendments and more. Don't just decide you don't want to vote and give up your right. Get your ass off the sofa and have a voice in how our country is run, or sit back and get use to bailing out the banks and big business when they screw up and you lose your retirement plan. Because unless something changes retirement will no longer be an option for anyone.
There are so many issues that are important to each of us that need to be changed. This is an election that is pushing barriers in all areas of the country. We have the first African American running for President and a woman on the ballot for Vice President. If nothing else vote because they are pushing for change just by being on the ballot.
Remember you can't bitch about the state of our country if you refuse to participate in voting for officials. If you are over the age of 18 and have 1 brain cell you have no excuse for not voting. If you make the choice not to vote because you don't like either candidate that is BS there are several Presidential candidates on the ballot or at least cancel out your vote. Remember there is more to vote for than just a President. There are amendments to our constitution, judges who are up for reelection, city and state amendments and more. Don't just decide you don't want to vote and give up your right. Get your ass off the sofa and have a voice in how our country is run, or sit back and get use to bailing out the banks and big business when they screw up and you lose your retirement plan. Because unless something changes retirement will no longer be an option for anyone.
One thing people learn about Tau really fast is that he is a wuss, a wimp and a cry baby. Tau has no aspiration of being the alpha dog or leader of the pack. He is happy to just follow along sniffing as he goes.
Tau and Kali both have a very particular diet, they eat boneless, skinless chicken breast most nights, once a week I will give them baked pork chops. Once in awhile they will get some ham or turkey, but the sodium is high in these items and it makes them pee alot. So mostly they just get chicken. If I am lazy and craving BBQ then I will swing by Rudy's and get some and Tau is my best friend until the BBQ is gone.
Imagine my shock and surprise when I came into the living room this evening to find Tau, my wimpy wuss sitting on the sofa eating a steak that he had stole off my plate on the coffee table. There was no apology when he was discovered he only moved farther down the sofa to continue eating HIS steak.
Tau has never been a steak eater so I am not sure what got into him tonight. But his sister has a new respect for him and his ability to get on the coffee table.
Tau and Kali both have a very particular diet, they eat boneless, skinless chicken breast most nights, once a week I will give them baked pork chops. Once in awhile they will get some ham or turkey, but the sodium is high in these items and it makes them pee alot. So mostly they just get chicken. If I am lazy and craving BBQ then I will swing by Rudy's and get some and Tau is my best friend until the BBQ is gone.
Imagine my shock and surprise when I came into the living room this evening to find Tau, my wimpy wuss sitting on the sofa eating a steak that he had stole off my plate on the coffee table. There was no apology when he was discovered he only moved farther down the sofa to continue eating HIS steak.
Tau has never been a steak eater so I am not sure what got into him tonight. But his sister has a new respect for him and his ability to get on the coffee table.
As I have been self analyzing the last few weeks I have been thinking about what my pet peeves are. Because no matter what pet peeves are personal and they are real. If someone continues to do something on your pet peeve list it gets annoying really fast. So here is my list of pet peeves that I have to add to "The List" so I do not get someone who does this.
1. Stupid People: Not stupid as in uneducated but stupid as in "ain't got the brains god gave a bug" stupid. People who drive 102 mph down the freeway and then think it is funny and don't understand why they are in jail for it. That is stupid.
2. People who can not except someone else view: These are those people who no matter what you think they want to change your mind. They will spend an entire conversation trying to convince you why you should think the way they do.
3. Rude People: These are the people who take out their day on those around them. Usually the waitstaff at a restaurant. They make sarcastic remarks to the waiter, demand attention, demand everything. And then claim to have been very courteous to them.
These are just more or less ones that do not need an explanation:
1. Socks with sandals when you are under 85
2. Coats when it is above 75 degree outside
3. Insisting that you read a book or watch a movie because they think you should
4. Not letting you get a word in
5. Talking over people
6. Not listening and then getting upset because you did something you did not want to do
7. Not accepting No as an answer
8. Snoring
9. Loud Base music, because no matter what it is, it sounds like polka
10. Rap music...pop music with rap mingled into it...classical music with rap music mingled into it...Just Rap music
11. Hoodies, why do kids want to look like the uni bomber
12. Women who are a size 20 wearing a size 2.
13. Women showing every roll they have. There are some things that are meant to be covered up.
14. Women who like to show their boobs, only a baby wants to see them and I ain't no baby.
That is all I can think of now, but give me time more will come up.
1. Stupid People: Not stupid as in uneducated but stupid as in "ain't got the brains god gave a bug" stupid. People who drive 102 mph down the freeway and then think it is funny and don't understand why they are in jail for it. That is stupid.
2. People who can not except someone else view: These are those people who no matter what you think they want to change your mind. They will spend an entire conversation trying to convince you why you should think the way they do.
3. Rude People: These are the people who take out their day on those around them. Usually the waitstaff at a restaurant. They make sarcastic remarks to the waiter, demand attention, demand everything. And then claim to have been very courteous to them.
These are just more or less ones that do not need an explanation:
1. Socks with sandals when you are under 85
2. Coats when it is above 75 degree outside
3. Insisting that you read a book or watch a movie because they think you should
4. Not letting you get a word in
5. Talking over people
6. Not listening and then getting upset because you did something you did not want to do
7. Not accepting No as an answer
8. Snoring
9. Loud Base music, because no matter what it is, it sounds like polka
10. Rap music...pop music with rap mingled into it...classical music with rap music mingled into it...Just Rap music
11. Hoodies, why do kids want to look like the uni bomber
12. Women who are a size 20 wearing a size 2.
13. Women showing every roll they have. There are some things that are meant to be covered up.
14. Women who like to show their boobs, only a baby wants to see them and I ain't no baby.
That is all I can think of now, but give me time more will come up.
Thank you to everyone who wrote me to tell me what a "Green Mile" was. Apparently there is even a movie with that title. I am still confused to why you would want a last meal if you were getting ready to be executed. Not that I have any first hand knowledge but from what I have heard on TV prison food is not that good so why would you want your last meal to be prison food.
Now if they were going to let you out to go and get a last meal that is another story all together.
Now if they were going to let you out to go and get a last meal that is another story all together.
Most of us think that an affair happens only one way. One partner has a sexual relationship with another person outside of their marriage. This is usually the only type of affair people think about. But, way back in January when I took my road trip for my birthday and meet with the lady in Jerome, she told me that #3 was not faithful to me. I immediately told her she was wrong that he did not have an affair that I would (god, I hoped) be able to tell. She told me “Affairs are not just sexual, think outside the box.” I put the thought out of my head because I already hated him enough; I did not need any more fuel to toss on the fire of hate. But, now that I am ready to start allowing a man into my life, I am really spending time focusing on what went wrong in past relationships both on my part and their part. I want to make sure that I do not repeat mistakes that I have done and I want to be able to see mistakes that they are doing so that it can be addressed right away.
So the last few weeks I have been thinking about what she said. If he was unfaithful to me but not sexually then how was he unfaithful to me? One of the things both of us did towards the end of the marriage was have not only separate friends but separate social lives as well. He had a group of friends that he liked to spend time with doing what he liked, hiking, camping, being outdoors etc. These are all things I hate and have no desire to do. Me on the other hand had friends that got together for more spiritual discussions on every topic from psychics to ghosts to the after life. These are things he is interested in but always felt he was on a higher level that I was and any type of conversation we had was more of a lecture and I was always accused of not wanting to participate in the conversation.
Anyway, so this is where our extra-marital affairs started. He went looking for friends who did things he enjoyed and spending time with them. Me I went looking for friends that I could enjoy spending time with. One thing leads to another and he was writing his books and using me as a secretary. It may have been fun bonding for him but it was agonizing work for me. So we are pulled farther and farther apart. But as people we still need the basic things and as a couple we still have things we need from each other. But as we drift apart the other person is no longer available to offer even the simplest of basic needs to their partner.
When I was down he was not there to help pick me up so I turned to friends. If I was sick he was not there to make me feel better so I turned to other people. When I was looking for companionship he was never available or I had to listen to him complain about money, not losing 5 pounds, he had a zit and could not be seen all these things that were nothing more than excuses not to be with me. So when he says our marriage was over before May of 2007 he is very correct. Our marriage ended the day we started turning to other people because we could not get what we needed from each other. So even though we were sexual faithful (again, I hope he was) we were not emotional faithful, friends faithful nor compassion faithful.
I think that before I can get into any relationship with a man I have to learn to not only be completely 100% faithful myself but when things start to change and turn I need to be able to see it, confront it and demand that it change. Affairs, no matter what kind they are, are deadly to a relationship. The day you realize you cannot turn to your spouse for the simplest and basic of needs is the day you need to either wake up and fix it or walk away. Hopefully, next time I will be able to do that before I get my heart broken.
So the last few weeks I have been thinking about what she said. If he was unfaithful to me but not sexually then how was he unfaithful to me? One of the things both of us did towards the end of the marriage was have not only separate friends but separate social lives as well. He had a group of friends that he liked to spend time with doing what he liked, hiking, camping, being outdoors etc. These are all things I hate and have no desire to do. Me on the other hand had friends that got together for more spiritual discussions on every topic from psychics to ghosts to the after life. These are things he is interested in but always felt he was on a higher level that I was and any type of conversation we had was more of a lecture and I was always accused of not wanting to participate in the conversation.
Anyway, so this is where our extra-marital affairs started. He went looking for friends who did things he enjoyed and spending time with them. Me I went looking for friends that I could enjoy spending time with. One thing leads to another and he was writing his books and using me as a secretary. It may have been fun bonding for him but it was agonizing work for me. So we are pulled farther and farther apart. But as people we still need the basic things and as a couple we still have things we need from each other. But as we drift apart the other person is no longer available to offer even the simplest of basic needs to their partner.
When I was down he was not there to help pick me up so I turned to friends. If I was sick he was not there to make me feel better so I turned to other people. When I was looking for companionship he was never available or I had to listen to him complain about money, not losing 5 pounds, he had a zit and could not be seen all these things that were nothing more than excuses not to be with me. So when he says our marriage was over before May of 2007 he is very correct. Our marriage ended the day we started turning to other people because we could not get what we needed from each other. So even though we were sexual faithful (again, I hope he was) we were not emotional faithful, friends faithful nor compassion faithful.
I think that before I can get into any relationship with a man I have to learn to not only be completely 100% faithful myself but when things start to change and turn I need to be able to see it, confront it and demand that it change. Affairs, no matter what kind they are, are deadly to a relationship. The day you realize you cannot turn to your spouse for the simplest and basic of needs is the day you need to either wake up and fix it or walk away. Hopefully, next time I will be able to do that before I get my heart broken.
My week started out cloudy, rainy and cold. But it has progressed to sunny, cool and beautiful and I got some wonderful and exciting news that I am sharing with everyone. I am going to be a Great Aunt; not once but twice. I got an email from my sister-in-law yesterday that she is going to be a grandma come next May. We both emailed back and forth sharing out excitement with each other. Even though she is technically no longer an “in-law” I refuse to give them back to #3 so she is still my sister-in-law and I so happy for Jill and Joe. I know the whole family is thrilled. In order to keep me in my “I’m going to be an auntie” mode my nephew, Matthew emailed me to say that his girlfriend is expecting as well. Two new babies in one day, needless to say I was veclempt. I now have another reason to buy to more “You think I’m cute you should see my Aunt” t-shirts. For those of you who do not know, Matt is my best friend, Tiffany’s son. We grew up together and Matt has been my nephew since the day he was born and I bitched at the nurses to clean the ink off of his feet. I just can’t get over that Tiffany and I are actually old enough to be grandparents. I may be old enough but I am certainly not mature enough to be a grandparent. I spoil my dogs what would I do with a grandchild? That is scary to even fantasize about.Anyway, after all the baby news and my superstition that things happen in 3’s I had to call Joshua and make sure he was not going to be calling me to tell me about a new baby because as much as I love nieces and nephews I am not ready to be a grandma yet. Thankfully, he assured me that he is not planning on making me a grandma anytime soon. So I release a sigh of relief and went back to my excitement.
So here is my official congratulations to Jill and Joe on the their new arrival and to Matthew on his new arrival.
I have come to the decision that my attempts at finding Mr. Right Now are futile. I am a member of one of the online dating services. I have met a few people from it that were okay, but for the most part they are just weird on so many levels. Below is an email I received from “Dave,” he saw my profile and liked it and here is what he had to say:
“My name is Dave; I live and work in Rio Rancho. I work as Quality Manager for a company that makes aircraft parts. I have 3 cats and 1 dog. My wife left me about a year ago this coming October. She is in charge of the divorce paperwork and I will sign when she gets them to me. I make this disclosure because at times when I attempt to communicate with a lady, the question comes up due to my separated status. I'm not pining for my wife and there will be no reconciliation. I was interested months ago and was able to convince her to come into couples counseling. As the weeks went by I realized her heart was not in it and she pulled out of the counseling. She left for what I guess were some of the small things that become big ones during a relationship if the communication stops. There was no abuse; no cheating and she left me for no one else. She left to start a new life and I am attempting to do the same.So that's the 900 lb gorilla and getting out of the way :)I liked your profile and think we could get along. I am sort of a homebody type but am working on getting out more. I am looking for a woman that would be interested in movies, dinner, lunch, breakfast, art shows, car shows, etc and whatever else may come our way. I am kind of out of practice :)Please write back if you find any of what I say to be interesting.Thanks”
And now all of you who thought “The List” was silly know why I wrote “The List”. He is a guy who not only does not know who I am but doesn’t even know my name. However, I now know his entire life story and it only took 4 paragraphs. Let’s analyze this email and see where Dave went wrong.
The first email you send to someone in the cyber dating world should not be your life story, but a simple “Hi, nice profile. Tell me more about yourself” The first paragraph is okay, he gives you his name; let you know he has a job and pets. The pet part was a nice touch. Then it just bombs from there.
His wife left him a year ago; sorry about that but I really don’t care. At this point in the conversation I am assuming you are single on some level. Then he goes on to say she is in charge of the paperwork and he will sign them when she gets them to him. This one line tells me he is not ready for the divorce, if he was he should be a bit more involved in the paperwork. He gives the impression that he does not care if the papers come today, tomorrow, next week or 10 years from now.
He explains telling you this because” when I attempt to communicate with a lady, the question comes up due to my separated status.” I can see how this would come up since it is the first thing he tells you about himself. He then tells me that he got her to agree to counseling but it did not work out. Again, I don’t care. Marriage counseling is a private affair and no one needs to know you went to marriage counseling. Especially someone you don’t know. Then I am informed of why she left. I am happy to read that there was no abuse (on who’s part he does not say), no cheating (again don’t know who would have cheated). Apparently she left to start a new life. After this email I can see why, in my mind I can picture them at a dinner party, the first person who walks up to Dave is told “We are married, have been for years, but she is not happy. I don’t know why, I don’t hit her or cheat on her. We went to marriage counseling but she was not in to it, blah blah blah” At this point a very confused cater waiter says “I only wanted to know if you wanted water or tea with your dinner, not your life story.”
He finishes up that story with the comment “So that's the 900 lb gorilla and getting out of the way.” What the hell does that mean, 900 lb gorilla? Is he saying his wife weighed 900 pounds?
He finished the email by telling me he liked my profiles and thinks we can get along. Are you kidding me? He then tells me about his hobbies (if you can call them that). First off he is a homebody but trying to get out more. A homebody, the last thing I need in my life is a homebody, I am a spur of the moment type of person, who on my way home gets the idea I want to go out dinner or to the movies or even out of town. A homebody fits no where in my life unless you are an hamster and live in a cage. Either way he is looking for a woman that is interested in all three meals (breakfast, lunch and dinner), movies, art shows and my favorite car shows. For a homebody he sure wants to go out a lot. But he does admit he is out of practice. Ya think?
Now maybe those of you who thought my list was silly understand more why I am putting out there exactly what I want. Because apparently this is what is looking for love and if that is the case I am glad I am not looking for it as well.
“My name is Dave; I live and work in Rio Rancho. I work as Quality Manager for a company that makes aircraft parts. I have 3 cats and 1 dog. My wife left me about a year ago this coming October. She is in charge of the divorce paperwork and I will sign when she gets them to me. I make this disclosure because at times when I attempt to communicate with a lady, the question comes up due to my separated status. I'm not pining for my wife and there will be no reconciliation. I was interested months ago and was able to convince her to come into couples counseling. As the weeks went by I realized her heart was not in it and she pulled out of the counseling. She left for what I guess were some of the small things that become big ones during a relationship if the communication stops. There was no abuse; no cheating and she left me for no one else. She left to start a new life and I am attempting to do the same.So that's the 900 lb gorilla and getting out of the way :)I liked your profile and think we could get along. I am sort of a homebody type but am working on getting out more. I am looking for a woman that would be interested in movies, dinner, lunch, breakfast, art shows, car shows, etc and whatever else may come our way. I am kind of out of practice :)Please write back if you find any of what I say to be interesting.Thanks”
And now all of you who thought “The List” was silly know why I wrote “The List”. He is a guy who not only does not know who I am but doesn’t even know my name. However, I now know his entire life story and it only took 4 paragraphs. Let’s analyze this email and see where Dave went wrong.
The first email you send to someone in the cyber dating world should not be your life story, but a simple “Hi, nice profile. Tell me more about yourself” The first paragraph is okay, he gives you his name; let you know he has a job and pets. The pet part was a nice touch. Then it just bombs from there.
His wife left him a year ago; sorry about that but I really don’t care. At this point in the conversation I am assuming you are single on some level. Then he goes on to say she is in charge of the paperwork and he will sign them when she gets them to him. This one line tells me he is not ready for the divorce, if he was he should be a bit more involved in the paperwork. He gives the impression that he does not care if the papers come today, tomorrow, next week or 10 years from now.
He explains telling you this because” when I attempt to communicate with a lady, the question comes up due to my separated status.” I can see how this would come up since it is the first thing he tells you about himself. He then tells me that he got her to agree to counseling but it did not work out. Again, I don’t care. Marriage counseling is a private affair and no one needs to know you went to marriage counseling. Especially someone you don’t know. Then I am informed of why she left. I am happy to read that there was no abuse (on who’s part he does not say), no cheating (again don’t know who would have cheated). Apparently she left to start a new life. After this email I can see why, in my mind I can picture them at a dinner party, the first person who walks up to Dave is told “We are married, have been for years, but she is not happy. I don’t know why, I don’t hit her or cheat on her. We went to marriage counseling but she was not in to it, blah blah blah” At this point a very confused cater waiter says “I only wanted to know if you wanted water or tea with your dinner, not your life story.”
He finishes up that story with the comment “So that's the 900 lb gorilla and getting out of the way.” What the hell does that mean, 900 lb gorilla? Is he saying his wife weighed 900 pounds?
He finished the email by telling me he liked my profiles and thinks we can get along. Are you kidding me? He then tells me about his hobbies (if you can call them that). First off he is a homebody but trying to get out more. A homebody, the last thing I need in my life is a homebody, I am a spur of the moment type of person, who on my way home gets the idea I want to go out dinner or to the movies or even out of town. A homebody fits no where in my life unless you are an hamster and live in a cage. Either way he is looking for a woman that is interested in all three meals (breakfast, lunch and dinner), movies, art shows and my favorite car shows. For a homebody he sure wants to go out a lot. But he does admit he is out of practice. Ya think?
Now maybe those of you who thought my list was silly understand more why I am putting out there exactly what I want. Because apparently this is what is looking for love and if that is the case I am glad I am not looking for it as well.
I always like to get these emails from friends. Mostly because you know they really don't care about the answers but it is fun to answer them yourself. I usually learn a thing or two about myself by answering these questions. Mostly that I am still crazy and insane. Just the way you guys like me. Seriously, if I was normal would you even want to hang out with me? I didn't think so.
Apple juice or orange juice? OJ all the way
Are you a morning or night person? Neither, I prefer the Afternoons
Which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods? Combine them together and they are great. Example: Dip salty french fries into a Chocolate Milkshake. YUMMY
Ninjas or pirates? Pirates
Ninjas vs pirates, discuss. The are no romance novels written about ninjas.
What was your favorite childhood television program? I don’t know.
Are you a collector of anything? Everything
If you could be any animal, what would you be? Great White Shark
If you could have any superpower, what would it be? To be able to breath underwater
What is usually your first thought when you wake up? Shit, I’m still here
What do you usually think about right before falling asleep? Shit, I’m still here
What's your favorite color? At this very moment, Purple
What's your favorite animal? Great White Shark and Orca’s
Do you believe in extraterrestrials or life on other planets? Absolutely, I think my ex’s came from another planet
Do you believe in ghosts? What kind of ghost hunter would I be if I did not believe in ghosts?
Ever been addicted to a video/computer game? Which one(s)?No
You're given 1 million dollars, what do you spend it on? Traveling
Have any bad habits? Probably
Which bad habits, if any, drive you crazy? Pampering my pets
List 3 of your best personality traits: You would have to ask some of my friends
List 3 of your worst personality traits: You would have to ask one of my ex’s
Have any celebrity crushes? I think Zac Efron is adorable. But, I am pretty sure that is an illegal crush cause he is still a baby.
List 1 thing you wish you could change about yourself: Feeling guilty about giving in to the dogs
Any tattoos or piercings? Both, although you have to know me to know where the tattoo is
What's the first thing you notice in the opposite sex? Their shoes
What personality traits do you look for in a partner? Sense of humor
What personality traits do you dislike in other people? Being rude to other people
Are you mostly a clean or messy person? I am a clutter person
Do you see yourself getting married in the next 5 years? HELL NO
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? By the beach
If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go? South Africa
List 5 goals on your life's to-do list: Swim with the great white sharks, swim with the whale sharks, travel to India, England, Spain and Africa, learn another language, visit Hanson Island to see the orca’s in the wild
Name 1 regret you have: Allowing myself to trust those who have hurt me
Name 1 thing you miss about being a kid: Not needing money
Name 1 thing you love about being an adult: Being able to travel anywhere I want any time I want
What's your favorite song of the moment? Who Knew by Pink
What's your favorite song of all time? Alejate by Josh Groban
What's your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night? Sleep
What's your favorite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon? Veg on the sofa with no plans at all
Have any hidden talents? I don’t think so
You're about to walk the green mile, what do you have as your last meal? What's the green mile and why do I need a meal?
What would be your dream job? Marine Biologist
Which would you rather have, 100 million dollars or true love? At this point in my life I’ll take the 100 million dollars
If you could have 3 wishes granted, what would they be? To see Josh anytime I wanted
To see my family anytime I wanted; To have a house on some exotic beach
Ever wish you were born the opposite sex? If so, why? Good God No
Name 1 thing not many people know about you: Don’t know.
If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to? Bhuela
Do you believe in the afterlife? Definitely, I have lots of haunting to do in the afterlife
Apple juice or orange juice? OJ all the way
Are you a morning or night person? Neither, I prefer the Afternoons
Which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods? Combine them together and they are great. Example: Dip salty french fries into a Chocolate Milkshake. YUMMY
Ninjas or pirates? Pirates
Ninjas vs pirates, discuss. The are no romance novels written about ninjas.
What was your favorite childhood television program? I don’t know.
Are you a collector of anything? Everything
If you could be any animal, what would you be? Great White Shark
If you could have any superpower, what would it be? To be able to breath underwater
What is usually your first thought when you wake up? Shit, I’m still here
What do you usually think about right before falling asleep? Shit, I’m still here
What's your favorite color? At this very moment, Purple
What's your favorite animal? Great White Shark and Orca’s
Do you believe in extraterrestrials or life on other planets? Absolutely, I think my ex’s came from another planet
Do you believe in ghosts? What kind of ghost hunter would I be if I did not believe in ghosts?
Ever been addicted to a video/computer game? Which one(s)?No
You're given 1 million dollars, what do you spend it on? Traveling
Have any bad habits? Probably
Which bad habits, if any, drive you crazy? Pampering my pets
List 3 of your best personality traits: You would have to ask some of my friends
List 3 of your worst personality traits: You would have to ask one of my ex’s
Have any celebrity crushes? I think Zac Efron is adorable. But, I am pretty sure that is an illegal crush cause he is still a baby.
List 1 thing you wish you could change about yourself: Feeling guilty about giving in to the dogs
Any tattoos or piercings? Both, although you have to know me to know where the tattoo is
What's the first thing you notice in the opposite sex? Their shoes
What personality traits do you look for in a partner? Sense of humor
What personality traits do you dislike in other people? Being rude to other people
Are you mostly a clean or messy person? I am a clutter person
Do you see yourself getting married in the next 5 years? HELL NO
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? By the beach
If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go? South Africa
List 5 goals on your life's to-do list: Swim with the great white sharks, swim with the whale sharks, travel to India, England, Spain and Africa, learn another language, visit Hanson Island to see the orca’s in the wild
Name 1 regret you have: Allowing myself to trust those who have hurt me
Name 1 thing you miss about being a kid: Not needing money
Name 1 thing you love about being an adult: Being able to travel anywhere I want any time I want
What's your favorite song of the moment? Who Knew by Pink
What's your favorite song of all time? Alejate by Josh Groban
What's your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night? Sleep
What's your favorite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon? Veg on the sofa with no plans at all
Have any hidden talents? I don’t think so
You're about to walk the green mile, what do you have as your last meal? What's the green mile and why do I need a meal?
What would be your dream job? Marine Biologist
Which would you rather have, 100 million dollars or true love? At this point in my life I’ll take the 100 million dollars
If you could have 3 wishes granted, what would they be? To see Josh anytime I wanted
To see my family anytime I wanted; To have a house on some exotic beach
Ever wish you were born the opposite sex? If so, why? Good God No
Name 1 thing not many people know about you: Don’t know.
If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to? Bhuela
Do you believe in the afterlife? Definitely, I have lots of haunting to do in the afterlife
Well my adventures with the hamsters, guinea pigs and 1 gerbil seem to never end. After a few weeks of sever itching Phyllis and I narrowed it down to the hay I was getting for the pigs. Apparently I am either allergic to it or there is a parasite that lives in it that I am allergic to. Either way, I have spent the last 3 weeks covered in hydrocortosone (Kyle, you can stop teasing me with cortosone now) and scratching in my sleep it seems the crisis has passed. THANK GOD. I have had to wash EVERYTHING a zillion times over the past week to make sure all cooties are gone. I have vacuumed my house so many times there are bare spot in the carpet.
This past weekend has seen Lorenzo go to his forever home and my mom and daughter pair, Snowball and Cinnamon have found a home as well. This leaves me with my two dowager dutchess' Zara and Zoe who are not adoptable and my crazy boy Mario. Mario has some people issues, mostly he does not like people. He has a possible home but he has a ways to go before he is able to leave.
As far as hamsters go since Franklin and Tunie have both crossed the Rainbow Bridge into Summerland we only have Guinevere and Parker left in the big hammie's and Lance who is my mini hammie. There is always Tommy Tune my OCD gerbil, who is the bright spot in all of them. I am still working on getting Guinevere to stay in her cage at night versus exploring the wild world around her. Lucky for me and unfortunately for her, I could not find her this morning. So the only think I could think of was to put her cage on the floor and hope she was smart enough to go back to it for food and her bed. And smart enough to do this before Kali and Tau found her.
I was very happy to find her sleeping in her nest when I got home from work. But, based on the way she freaks out when you walk into the room now, I am guessing she got a bit scared not having mommy find her and put her back. Maybe now she will stop escaping.
So for now life in the sanctuary is less scratchy and chaotic but as always fun.
This past weekend has seen Lorenzo go to his forever home and my mom and daughter pair, Snowball and Cinnamon have found a home as well. This leaves me with my two dowager dutchess' Zara and Zoe who are not adoptable and my crazy boy Mario. Mario has some people issues, mostly he does not like people. He has a possible home but he has a ways to go before he is able to leave.
As far as hamsters go since Franklin and Tunie have both crossed the Rainbow Bridge into Summerland we only have Guinevere and Parker left in the big hammie's and Lance who is my mini hammie. There is always Tommy Tune my OCD gerbil, who is the bright spot in all of them. I am still working on getting Guinevere to stay in her cage at night versus exploring the wild world around her. Lucky for me and unfortunately for her, I could not find her this morning. So the only think I could think of was to put her cage on the floor and hope she was smart enough to go back to it for food and her bed. And smart enough to do this before Kali and Tau found her.
I was very happy to find her sleeping in her nest when I got home from work. But, based on the way she freaks out when you walk into the room now, I am guessing she got a bit scared not having mommy find her and put her back. Maybe now she will stop escaping.
So for now life in the sanctuary is less scratchy and chaotic but as always fun.
I had some interesting insight yesterday that I was really not prepared for but, got it anyway. I was once again thinking about another person who was in my life and is probably no longer thanks to the great divorce. I had a bit of melancholy over this because this was a very important person in my life. But, this is how it goes. People come and people go in our lives rarely do we know someone for the entire span of our lifetime.
Anyway, that was not my insight, I was thinking about how excited I got early this week when I saw a house that I was really interested in and really wanted to pursue getting it. One thing led to another and it did not work out but the thought that I was willing to look at a house here in New Mexico, even if it was so far West I might as well have lived in Arizona was surprising to me. Just last month I was really up for moving to Wyoming. I still want to move to Wyoming but jobs and homes are few and far between so my theory is if it is meant to be it will happen.
This prompted me to start thinking about all the times I have moved in my life and why I moved in the first place. Almost all of those times revolved around moving for someone else. I chose to live farther away from my parent because of #2, I left Texas to follow #3. Following #3 has had me move from Texas to Arizona to New Mexico and we would have moved more often but finances were in the way. Thank god, because I hate to move.
So here I am looking at my moving pattern and realizing that most of the time when I move it is because of someone else. I have moved once or twice for myself. I moved to West University because I wanted to be closer to work and in the heart of Houston and I loved every second of living in West University. I like where I live now and I made that decision all by myself, I chose my current house because of the courtyard and sun room which are perfect for the kids.
Now I am thinking of moving to Wyoming because I want to be closer to my son. Which I still think is a great idea but again, I am going to move based on someone else's life and not my own. So I have decided that for the time being I am going to follow my life by following my guides. If they think I need to move somewhere they will open the way to do. I am simply going to put out to them what I want and what I need and let them do their job of taking care of me and my happiness. Based on what is going on at this moment in my life I can tell you that it does not involve moving to Wyoming or any other state for that matter.
So I am either happy to tell or sorry to say (it depends on who you are) that it looks like I may be here for a while longer.
Don't ya'll all cheer at once now.
Anyway, that was not my insight, I was thinking about how excited I got early this week when I saw a house that I was really interested in and really wanted to pursue getting it. One thing led to another and it did not work out but the thought that I was willing to look at a house here in New Mexico, even if it was so far West I might as well have lived in Arizona was surprising to me. Just last month I was really up for moving to Wyoming. I still want to move to Wyoming but jobs and homes are few and far between so my theory is if it is meant to be it will happen.
This prompted me to start thinking about all the times I have moved in my life and why I moved in the first place. Almost all of those times revolved around moving for someone else. I chose to live farther away from my parent because of #2, I left Texas to follow #3. Following #3 has had me move from Texas to Arizona to New Mexico and we would have moved more often but finances were in the way. Thank god, because I hate to move.
So here I am looking at my moving pattern and realizing that most of the time when I move it is because of someone else. I have moved once or twice for myself. I moved to West University because I wanted to be closer to work and in the heart of Houston and I loved every second of living in West University. I like where I live now and I made that decision all by myself, I chose my current house because of the courtyard and sun room which are perfect for the kids.
Now I am thinking of moving to Wyoming because I want to be closer to my son. Which I still think is a great idea but again, I am going to move based on someone else's life and not my own. So I have decided that for the time being I am going to follow my life by following my guides. If they think I need to move somewhere they will open the way to do. I am simply going to put out to them what I want and what I need and let them do their job of taking care of me and my happiness. Based on what is going on at this moment in my life I can tell you that it does not involve moving to Wyoming or any other state for that matter.
So I am either happy to tell or sorry to say (it depends on who you are) that it looks like I may be here for a while longer.
Don't ya'll all cheer at once now.
“To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead"
Bertrand Russell
This quote was sent to me in an email along with expert advice on how to go about finding love. One thing people have a hard time with is understanding that I have no desire for love. Why is that so hard to grasp?
First off I did not know who Bertrand Russell was so I looked him up. He was quite an interesting character. He was born in 1872 and died in 1970. Here is what wikipedia had to say in their opening paragraph about him
“…was a British philosopher, historian, logician, mathematician, advocate for social reform, and pacifist. Although usually regarded as English, as he spent the majority of his life in England, he was born and raised in Wales.”
He won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1950 in literature. He married a Quaker woman Alys Pearsall Smith in 1894, in 1901 while on a bike ride he realized he no longer loved her and spent the next several years traveling around and having affairs with various and numerous women. In 1921 after returning to England with his pregnant lover, Dora Black, he arranged a hasty divorce and married Dora 6 days later. Russell and Dora divorced in 1932, he then married his third wife Patricia Spence; his children’s nanny; in 1936. He divorced her in 1952 and married his fourth wife Edith Finch in December of that year and stayed with Edith until his death in 1970.
It was surprising to learn that he was an advocate of “easy divorce.” Really, who would think after divorcing 3 women that he would support easy divorce. However, he only supported easy divorce if there were no children. Does that mean he wanted his divorce from Dora; whom he had two children and Patricia; whom he had one son, to be difficult? He felt that if you had children you should stay married for the children and have affairs with anyone you wanted and you should be tolerant of those affairs. I have to wonder if he was okay with the wife having the affairs or if only he was allowed to have the affairs and she was suppose to be okay with it. My conclusion is that since they divorced the wives were not tolerant to his affairs.
He did support the women’s suffrage movement so there is one redeeming quality. He wrote a paper called “Marriage and Morals” which went against the Victorian ideals of marriage and sex. He basically thought anyone should be able to have sex married or not, as long as they were in love. This only worked as long as the women where whores. That was the only acceptable way during the Victorian era. Am I for that? Not really. But, to be honest “respectable” men did not want to marry a non-virgin, they were considered loose and not appropriate for marriage into society. So it was a catch 22 for the Victorian men, screw who you want - just don’t marry them.
In defense of Mr. Bertrand he did have several redeeming qualities I just don’t feel that love was one of them. So why am I going on about this man’s quote? Because, it goes back to everyone must have love or they are not fit to be a human in our universe.
I am not afraid of love. I don’t believe in love between two adults. You can not be afraid of something you do not believe in and have never experienced. Why would I believe in something that I have 100% accuracy in proving does not exist? Not once in my life have I been successful in love with a spouse or boyfriend, so therefore by my own experimentation it does not exist. It is not like I found it and lost it, I have never found it. It is like looking for a treasure that there is no real proof ever existed. People have all talked about and some claim to have seen it but there is no definite, written, provable, verifiable proof that love exists. I believe lust, friendship, fondness, and compassion can happen between two people but not love.
I love my dogs more than anything in life. I could never imagine waking up one day and say “I am tired of them barking and they need to go. I can not be happy as long as these two dogs are in my life.” If I could do that I would be no better than the animal abusers out there. But, I never once would think of doing this and I get choked up just writing about it. If I feel this way about my dogs and they are only pets. How can you say you love someone one day and the next you decided that you life would be so much better without this person in it? You explain it away by saying life changed, things changed, you changed, you grew apart. My response to that is “If you are in love with this person, these things would not matter. They would never even come up. Because; from what people tell me, love conquers all.” So that in itself proves I have never had love. #1 wanted to live life, #2 wanted to live life with someone else, #3 wanted to live life without me. All three professed to love me and all three woke up one day and decided I no longer fit into their lives or their image of what they wanted in life.
I would like to think that one day a man will come along and sweep me off my feet and I will fall madly in love with him and live happily ever after. But, I know myself well enough to know that anyone who professes to love me better be willing to back it up because the words I Love You mean nothing to me they are only words and words can always be taken back when you change your mind.
Bertrand Russell
This quote was sent to me in an email along with expert advice on how to go about finding love. One thing people have a hard time with is understanding that I have no desire for love. Why is that so hard to grasp?
First off I did not know who Bertrand Russell was so I looked him up. He was quite an interesting character. He was born in 1872 and died in 1970. Here is what wikipedia had to say in their opening paragraph about him
“…was a British philosopher, historian, logician, mathematician, advocate for social reform, and pacifist. Although usually regarded as English, as he spent the majority of his life in England, he was born and raised in Wales.”
He won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1950 in literature. He married a Quaker woman Alys Pearsall Smith in 1894, in 1901 while on a bike ride he realized he no longer loved her and spent the next several years traveling around and having affairs with various and numerous women. In 1921 after returning to England with his pregnant lover, Dora Black, he arranged a hasty divorce and married Dora 6 days later. Russell and Dora divorced in 1932, he then married his third wife Patricia Spence; his children’s nanny; in 1936. He divorced her in 1952 and married his fourth wife Edith Finch in December of that year and stayed with Edith until his death in 1970.
It was surprising to learn that he was an advocate of “easy divorce.” Really, who would think after divorcing 3 women that he would support easy divorce. However, he only supported easy divorce if there were no children. Does that mean he wanted his divorce from Dora; whom he had two children and Patricia; whom he had one son, to be difficult? He felt that if you had children you should stay married for the children and have affairs with anyone you wanted and you should be tolerant of those affairs. I have to wonder if he was okay with the wife having the affairs or if only he was allowed to have the affairs and she was suppose to be okay with it. My conclusion is that since they divorced the wives were not tolerant to his affairs.
He did support the women’s suffrage movement so there is one redeeming quality. He wrote a paper called “Marriage and Morals” which went against the Victorian ideals of marriage and sex. He basically thought anyone should be able to have sex married or not, as long as they were in love. This only worked as long as the women where whores. That was the only acceptable way during the Victorian era. Am I for that? Not really. But, to be honest “respectable” men did not want to marry a non-virgin, they were considered loose and not appropriate for marriage into society. So it was a catch 22 for the Victorian men, screw who you want - just don’t marry them.
In defense of Mr. Bertrand he did have several redeeming qualities I just don’t feel that love was one of them. So why am I going on about this man’s quote? Because, it goes back to everyone must have love or they are not fit to be a human in our universe.
I am not afraid of love. I don’t believe in love between two adults. You can not be afraid of something you do not believe in and have never experienced. Why would I believe in something that I have 100% accuracy in proving does not exist? Not once in my life have I been successful in love with a spouse or boyfriend, so therefore by my own experimentation it does not exist. It is not like I found it and lost it, I have never found it. It is like looking for a treasure that there is no real proof ever existed. People have all talked about and some claim to have seen it but there is no definite, written, provable, verifiable proof that love exists. I believe lust, friendship, fondness, and compassion can happen between two people but not love.
I love my dogs more than anything in life. I could never imagine waking up one day and say “I am tired of them barking and they need to go. I can not be happy as long as these two dogs are in my life.” If I could do that I would be no better than the animal abusers out there. But, I never once would think of doing this and I get choked up just writing about it. If I feel this way about my dogs and they are only pets. How can you say you love someone one day and the next you decided that you life would be so much better without this person in it? You explain it away by saying life changed, things changed, you changed, you grew apart. My response to that is “If you are in love with this person, these things would not matter. They would never even come up. Because; from what people tell me, love conquers all.” So that in itself proves I have never had love. #1 wanted to live life, #2 wanted to live life with someone else, #3 wanted to live life without me. All three professed to love me and all three woke up one day and decided I no longer fit into their lives or their image of what they wanted in life.
I would like to think that one day a man will come along and sweep me off my feet and I will fall madly in love with him and live happily ever after. But, I know myself well enough to know that anyone who professes to love me better be willing to back it up because the words I Love You mean nothing to me they are only words and words can always be taken back when you change your mind.
Well I have to say that the response I have received to my list for my perspective partner has garnered some interesting attention.
I have been told that I have created Jesus and this person probably does not exist. I have been advised to not be so picky; I have been given lots of advice from people on better ways to find the person I am looking for. Even #3 has given his opinion. Most of you that know me well enough know this is exactly what I would do and those who do not know me very well think I am just crazy and actually both groups are correct.
Of course this is not a normal conventional way to find a partner, but when have you ever known me to be normal and conventional? Basically all I have done is write a list of what I would like to have my partner be like, I also wrote a list of the things I do not want in a partner.
I really only have 2 failed marriages to pull from since #1 and I were 18 when we got married and 20 when we separated. So that does not count because we were kids and my memory does not go back that far to remember the good and the bad. So what I did was think of what I disliked about #2 and #3 and what I do not want to deal with again. I already married the drug addict alcoholic so I don’t need to repeat that again. Since being married to a drug addict alcoholic I have little tolerance for those who do drugs (even smoking pot) and drinking. So the best way to deal with that is ask for someone who does not drink or do drugs. I don’t smoke so I don’t want someone who does. I don’t like porno and would prefer my man to want to look at me versus some naked woman on the internet. But, I am willing to compromise, if he wants to look at porno he gets to buy me a pair of shoes every time he feels the need to wander. That will work for me.
The financially stable, job, car and home part is a no brainer. I am not taking anyone in to raise them they need to be responsible on their own two feet. I am only a mother to Joshua and no one else. If they want a mother I suggest they live at home.
Confidence in their own sexuality and willing to express their wants and needs comes from both marriages and a few others mixed in. I’m not a fucking mind reader and just because you said it once does not mean I am remembering it for all eternity. If you can’t say what you want then you are not going to get it. End of conversation. Get over the hurdles, the mind blocks, the mother issues, ex issues and just say it. If you want me to dress up like Little Bo Peep for God’s sake fine but unless you tell me, how am I going to know?
They have to be kind to people and respect people whether they like them or not. And they can’t dismiss someone because there is a character flaw they don’t like. #2 hated Jewish people, why I don’t know. I am sure it was something his father said. He openly admitting to hating his father more than life itself, yet he kissed his ass like it was coated in chocolate. Unlike most men he had father issues versus mother issues. Anyway, he was convinced the Jewish people were the evils of the world. Yet he advised a friend of mine who was an actress to change her name to Goldstein to get ahead in the acting business. My guess was because he thought he was so knowledgeable about the acting world, when in reality he just wanted to hit on her and she could not stand him. There is a great saying “Don’t judge a book by the cover.” Well people do it everyday and it is just wrong. However, I will admit there is this lady that lives in Phyllis’ apartments and she is a little person. I have never met her but the woman scares the crap out of me. She just looks mean. Phyllis assures me she is a very nice lady, but I have my doubts.
One of the biggest things I hated about both marriages was their inability to accept my opinion or knowledge on various subjects. I had a saying with #3 “You will believe me when we have been married for 10 years” Yeah, guess that won’t happen. But I could say the sky is a beautiful blue and both would argue with me about it. Believe it or not, there are quite a few things I am knowledgeable about, but I felt neither of them cared unless it would benefit them in one way or another. Usually it revolved around my abilities to fix a computer. Neither trusted me to know anything about religion, politics, or anything at all. They always felt they were more experienced and knowledgeable about everything and made me feel like I was the stupidest person on the planet. So my next partner has to be able to accept my knowledge or lack of; with grace and pose and be willing to teach me what I don’t know without being condescending.
On the upside there were things that I liked about the marriages that I wanted to have again in another relationship. Okay, there was nothing about #2 that I liked and would want again. Except maybe the torturing I did when I left. God he was so easy to torture. So basically it is just past relationships and #3. I liked the traveling, I liked that he did not watch sports, I liked that he did not camp (at least at the beginning), fish or hunt. I like a man who likes to wander a museum (an not a stupid sports museum) but any art or history museum in any town we may be in. I like that if we are in a town I have never been before but they have that they are comfortable and confident enough to show me around. I like for them to want to protect me if I feel threatened by my surrounding (it does not happen often but once in awhile it does). I like that if there is a flying cockroach in the house and I run out screaming he will stay and kill the cockroach and not be running beside me screaming like a girl. I like a guy who likes my dogs and understands that they are a huge part of my life and he wants them to be a huge part of his as well and he would never think to discipline them.
So you see it was not all one sided of what I don’t want but it was two sided on what I want and don’t want.
I have been told that I have created Jesus and this person probably does not exist. I have been advised to not be so picky; I have been given lots of advice from people on better ways to find the person I am looking for. Even #3 has given his opinion. Most of you that know me well enough know this is exactly what I would do and those who do not know me very well think I am just crazy and actually both groups are correct.
Of course this is not a normal conventional way to find a partner, but when have you ever known me to be normal and conventional? Basically all I have done is write a list of what I would like to have my partner be like, I also wrote a list of the things I do not want in a partner.
I really only have 2 failed marriages to pull from since #1 and I were 18 when we got married and 20 when we separated. So that does not count because we were kids and my memory does not go back that far to remember the good and the bad. So what I did was think of what I disliked about #2 and #3 and what I do not want to deal with again. I already married the drug addict alcoholic so I don’t need to repeat that again. Since being married to a drug addict alcoholic I have little tolerance for those who do drugs (even smoking pot) and drinking. So the best way to deal with that is ask for someone who does not drink or do drugs. I don’t smoke so I don’t want someone who does. I don’t like porno and would prefer my man to want to look at me versus some naked woman on the internet. But, I am willing to compromise, if he wants to look at porno he gets to buy me a pair of shoes every time he feels the need to wander. That will work for me.
The financially stable, job, car and home part is a no brainer. I am not taking anyone in to raise them they need to be responsible on their own two feet. I am only a mother to Joshua and no one else. If they want a mother I suggest they live at home.
Confidence in their own sexuality and willing to express their wants and needs comes from both marriages and a few others mixed in. I’m not a fucking mind reader and just because you said it once does not mean I am remembering it for all eternity. If you can’t say what you want then you are not going to get it. End of conversation. Get over the hurdles, the mind blocks, the mother issues, ex issues and just say it. If you want me to dress up like Little Bo Peep for God’s sake fine but unless you tell me, how am I going to know?
They have to be kind to people and respect people whether they like them or not. And they can’t dismiss someone because there is a character flaw they don’t like. #2 hated Jewish people, why I don’t know. I am sure it was something his father said. He openly admitting to hating his father more than life itself, yet he kissed his ass like it was coated in chocolate. Unlike most men he had father issues versus mother issues. Anyway, he was convinced the Jewish people were the evils of the world. Yet he advised a friend of mine who was an actress to change her name to Goldstein to get ahead in the acting business. My guess was because he thought he was so knowledgeable about the acting world, when in reality he just wanted to hit on her and she could not stand him. There is a great saying “Don’t judge a book by the cover.” Well people do it everyday and it is just wrong. However, I will admit there is this lady that lives in Phyllis’ apartments and she is a little person. I have never met her but the woman scares the crap out of me. She just looks mean. Phyllis assures me she is a very nice lady, but I have my doubts.
One of the biggest things I hated about both marriages was their inability to accept my opinion or knowledge on various subjects. I had a saying with #3 “You will believe me when we have been married for 10 years” Yeah, guess that won’t happen. But I could say the sky is a beautiful blue and both would argue with me about it. Believe it or not, there are quite a few things I am knowledgeable about, but I felt neither of them cared unless it would benefit them in one way or another. Usually it revolved around my abilities to fix a computer. Neither trusted me to know anything about religion, politics, or anything at all. They always felt they were more experienced and knowledgeable about everything and made me feel like I was the stupidest person on the planet. So my next partner has to be able to accept my knowledge or lack of; with grace and pose and be willing to teach me what I don’t know without being condescending.
On the upside there were things that I liked about the marriages that I wanted to have again in another relationship. Okay, there was nothing about #2 that I liked and would want again. Except maybe the torturing I did when I left. God he was so easy to torture. So basically it is just past relationships and #3. I liked the traveling, I liked that he did not watch sports, I liked that he did not camp (at least at the beginning), fish or hunt. I like a man who likes to wander a museum (an not a stupid sports museum) but any art or history museum in any town we may be in. I like that if we are in a town I have never been before but they have that they are comfortable and confident enough to show me around. I like for them to want to protect me if I feel threatened by my surrounding (it does not happen often but once in awhile it does). I like that if there is a flying cockroach in the house and I run out screaming he will stay and kill the cockroach and not be running beside me screaming like a girl. I like a guy who likes my dogs and understands that they are a huge part of my life and he wants them to be a huge part of his as well and he would never think to discipline them.
So you see it was not all one sided of what I don’t want but it was two sided on what I want and don’t want.
So here is my list of what I want and don't want in a partner. Feel free to add anything you think is important or that I may have forgotten.
Yes Please
Must be mentally stable
Must be mentally mature
Have a professional job that goes with their age.
Be financially stable
Has a car
Has own home
Well groomed
Dresses well
Has a good sense of humor
Respects everyone even those they don’t like
Confident in their own sexuality
Confident expressing their own sexual needs and wants
Loves animals
Likes to travel
Likes the beach
Can be spontaneous
Has a good relationship with his family
Has self worth
Open Minded
Kind to everyone
Is willing to talk about issues effecting them
Always willing to stop what they are doing for romance
Can defiantly multi task
Artistic
Love music and art
Can communicate their wants and needs
Enjoys celebrating holidays no matter how simple
Enjoys teaching as well as learning
Knows what they want in life and is not afraid to go for it.
Willing to help their partner achieve their goals in life
No Thanks
No Drinking…Even Socially
No Drugs…Even Marijuana
No Smoking…Even Socially
No Pornography
No Sports
No preconceived likes or dislikes against people based on religion, weight, politics, ethnicity, or any other shallow reasons.
No small children. Grown kids are fine.
Does not like to camp, fish, hunt, etc
Does not have anger issues or violent temper
Personal Side
Has to be taller than me
Prefer someone older than me
Able to express emotions but still be manly
Does not need to “take care” of me in order to be with me
Has enough self-confidence to allow me to be independent
Cannot be jealous in any way
Has to be able to trust their partner
Always up for a weekend away
Always willing to take Tau & Kali on the weekend away
Money is great but has to be able to let it come and go
Yes Please
Must be mentally stable
Must be mentally mature
Have a professional job that goes with their age.
Be financially stable
Has a car
Has own home
Well groomed
Dresses well
Has a good sense of humor
Respects everyone even those they don’t like
Confident in their own sexuality
Confident expressing their own sexual needs and wants
Loves animals
Likes to travel
Likes the beach
Can be spontaneous
Has a good relationship with his family
Has self worth
Open Minded
Kind to everyone
Is willing to talk about issues effecting them
Always willing to stop what they are doing for romance
Can defiantly multi task
Artistic
Love music and art
Can communicate their wants and needs
Enjoys celebrating holidays no matter how simple
Enjoys teaching as well as learning
Knows what they want in life and is not afraid to go for it.
Willing to help their partner achieve their goals in life
No Thanks
No Drinking…Even Socially
No Drugs…Even Marijuana
No Smoking…Even Socially
No Pornography
No Sports
No preconceived likes or dislikes against people based on religion, weight, politics, ethnicity, or any other shallow reasons.
No small children. Grown kids are fine.
Does not like to camp, fish, hunt, etc
Does not have anger issues or violent temper
Personal Side
Has to be taller than me
Prefer someone older than me
Able to express emotions but still be manly
Does not need to “take care” of me in order to be with me
Has enough self-confidence to allow me to be independent
Cannot be jealous in any way
Has to be able to trust their partner
Always up for a weekend away
Always willing to take Tau & Kali on the weekend away
Money is great but has to be able to let it come and go
It has been 495 days since we “Called It A Day” and I think I am ready to take the next step forward in my life. So what is the next step you ask? Well several weeks ago I started thinking about letting a guy back into my life. Someone not already in a committed relationship, married and more than just dinner or lunch. But, I am still not interested in a happily ever after with a guy. I just want the companionship that comes with one. I have all the details I need to do a little casting in order to start the process. The last few weeks I have been working on who the perfect partner is for me, based on my needs, wants, likes and dislikes. I figured out that we meet a guy and instead of making sure everything about them fits with us we take their issues, idiosyncrasies, likes, dislikes, wants and needs and try to make them fit into our lives. We tell ourselves we are compromising for the one we love but we’re not we are trying to change our lives and ourselves to fit them. Well let me tell you, I am an expert on how that does not work.
#3 bases his whole existence on astrology, every part of his life it dictated by his astrological chart. Any thing he does he goes based on what astrology tells him. He had my chart done long before we ever looked at each other as possible partners, he knew there were issues in our astrology that were not compatible but he thought the things that were compatible would overcome it. He was very sad to find out it does not work that way. I on the other hand use astrology as a tool not a lifeline. One thing I have learned from living life the Pagan way is to use astrology, tarot cards, spell casting and the Law of Attraction as the tool they are. These are not definite, written in stone rules. So if your astrology say you are in the perfect place for winning big at the casino however, that could be big as in $500 or $500,000. This does not mean you can go out and buy a car based on astrology saying you have a good chance of winning big. Because then, Murphy’s Law plays into the game and gives you $50 instead of $500,000 and now you are screwed.
So to start my adventure I have done a few things already, one I got the ingredients I need for the spell, I know exactly what day and what time to do my work. This is no guarantee; but it helps if you have it planned out perfectly. Using Tarot as a tool, I know when the best time of the year is when I am more willing to accept a new person into my life, based on psychics I was able to clarify when that time would be. Based on the Law of Attraction I know what to focus on to bring this person into my life. And finally, based on Astrology I know what qualities I want him to have.
So my next post will be a list of the qualities I need in a guy based on my lifestyle and own idiosyncrasies.
So here in New Mexico you always know it is October by Balloon Fiesta. For those of you who live outside of the normal realm of life Balloon Fiesta is an annual fiesta with hot air balloons. It happens the first week of October every year in Albuquerque and believe it or not people come from all over the world to either fly their balloons or watch the balloons. Me, not so much. I have seen their mass accession but only because #3 and I were going going out of town and up really early. All the other years I have seen the balloons on my way to work in the morning. Seriously, as far as I am concerned once you've seen it you've seen it.
But there is one thing that happens every October that I love to do and that is the Arts & Craft show they have. I love it, this year was so much better than the other years. My friends, Harold and Jim joined Phyllis and I for the adventure. I think Harold and I were into it more than Jim and Phyllis. But we all had a great time.
So that is my first October event. Tomorrow is all about cleaning house since it is suppose to be bad weather. Next weekend I am working for after that who knows what I am up to. I am still on for Sedona on November 1st. I have not decided if I am staying overnight or just the day. Phyllis is going for the trip so we will probably know more around October 31st.
Check out one of my favorite things from the arts show the website is www.coblossoms.com they use real flowers and leaves that they grow themselves to make the pictures. The ones of the mountain and field scenes are amazing.
But there is one thing that happens every October that I love to do and that is the Arts & Craft show they have. I love it, this year was so much better than the other years. My friends, Harold and Jim joined Phyllis and I for the adventure. I think Harold and I were into it more than Jim and Phyllis. But we all had a great time.
So that is my first October event. Tomorrow is all about cleaning house since it is suppose to be bad weather. Next weekend I am working for after that who knows what I am up to. I am still on for Sedona on November 1st. I have not decided if I am staying overnight or just the day. Phyllis is going for the trip so we will probably know more around October 31st.
Check out one of my favorite things from the arts show the website is www.coblossoms.com they use real flowers and leaves that they grow themselves to make the pictures. The ones of the mountain and field scenes are amazing.
Once again it was a sad night here at Haven for Hamsters. Frankie has crossed the Rainbow Bridge into Summerland.
Franklin was a truly wonderful friend to have for the time I was blessed to have him. As I am sure you remember Franklin came to me by way of the city shelter. I knew he was already an older hamster when I got him but I thought I had more time.
A few days ago when he was down I was able to hold him for a few minutes and realized he was getting thinner. We once referred to him as our Hamster Buddha because he was so chubby. As the days progressed I noticed he was having trouble seeing and he seemed to not be able to find seeds and nuts when he dropped them. But he carried on.
Franklin was a quiet hamster who spent most of his time sleeping in his condo but he would come down once in awhile for his food and treats. It was because of Franklin that I started the rescue group. I did not want another hamster or small animal live neglected or fed to another animal.
So as I say farewell to another furry friend I know he is at peace in the garden with Ms. Tunie enjoying their self in the lap of luxury.
Franklin was a truly wonderful friend to have for the time I was blessed to have him. As I am sure you remember Franklin came to me by way of the city shelter. I knew he was already an older hamster when I got him but I thought I had more time.
A few days ago when he was down I was able to hold him for a few minutes and realized he was getting thinner. We once referred to him as our Hamster Buddha because he was so chubby. As the days progressed I noticed he was having trouble seeing and he seemed to not be able to find seeds and nuts when he dropped them. But he carried on.
Franklin was a quiet hamster who spent most of his time sleeping in his condo but he would come down once in awhile for his food and treats. It was because of Franklin that I started the rescue group. I did not want another hamster or small animal live neglected or fed to another animal.
So as I say farewell to another furry friend I know he is at peace in the garden with Ms. Tunie enjoying their self in the lap of luxury.
Well the last post I said I was 100% sure that Lorenzo was a Sophia. Well I was wrong. Yes, I said it. I was wrong. Lorenzo is still a Lorenzo. When I thought Lorenzo was a girl I put him in with the girls and let me tell you they were pissed.
Lorenzo turned into Mario and started being a boy, well my two British Dowagers were not happy with this turn of events. Luckily, I figured it out fast enough to save their dignity. Once I removed him I flipped him over and low and behold what was once hidden is not any longer. So basically he just needed something to excite him in order for his little "piggie" to come out.
Now we are back to piggie happiness. All the girls are in their respective cages, Mario is in his and Lorenzo is in his. Mario and Lorenzo are on opposite sides of the room to keep them from strutting at each other. Lorenzo is infatuated with Tau and Kali. He does not know he should be scared of them so he runs to the side of the cage to watch them when they stand there barking and pawing at him. They have tried once or twice to get into his cage when the door is open but so far have not achieved it.
Stay tuned for more piggie pandamonium. Tomorrow I got to get a High Rise for Tommy the Gerbil. It is a 3 story addition to a 10 gallon aquarium, this will stimulate his need for activities and things to keep him busy. Unlike the hamsters who like to sleep and run on a wheel. Gerbils like to be active and busy. They are what I call an "active brain" animal. Much like otters they need to be kept stimulated in order to stay healthy. I do this now by adding things to his cage and the removing it a few days later. He goes about re arranging his cage to accomodate the new additions. Now he will have 3 stories to tdo this with. Also, gerbils like to burrow under things, where as hamsters make nests usually up in the air above their cage. Each hamster has a separate sleeping quarters in their cage for this need. Tommy changes his sleeping area weekly. I never know where he is sleeping until I see the bedding start to move.
Once it is up and working I will post pictures so you can see it.
Lorenzo turned into Mario and started being a boy, well my two British Dowagers were not happy with this turn of events. Luckily, I figured it out fast enough to save their dignity. Once I removed him I flipped him over and low and behold what was once hidden is not any longer. So basically he just needed something to excite him in order for his little "piggie" to come out.
Now we are back to piggie happiness. All the girls are in their respective cages, Mario is in his and Lorenzo is in his. Mario and Lorenzo are on opposite sides of the room to keep them from strutting at each other. Lorenzo is infatuated with Tau and Kali. He does not know he should be scared of them so he runs to the side of the cage to watch them when they stand there barking and pawing at him. They have tried once or twice to get into his cage when the door is open but so far have not achieved it.
Stay tuned for more piggie pandamonium. Tomorrow I got to get a High Rise for Tommy the Gerbil. It is a 3 story addition to a 10 gallon aquarium, this will stimulate his need for activities and things to keep him busy. Unlike the hamsters who like to sleep and run on a wheel. Gerbils like to be active and busy. They are what I call an "active brain" animal. Much like otters they need to be kept stimulated in order to stay healthy. I do this now by adding things to his cage and the removing it a few days later. He goes about re arranging his cage to accomodate the new additions. Now he will have 3 stories to tdo this with. Also, gerbils like to burrow under things, where as hamsters make nests usually up in the air above their cage. Each hamster has a separate sleeping quarters in their cage for this need. Tommy changes his sleeping area weekly. I never know where he is sleeping until I see the bedding start to move.
Once it is up and working I will post pictures so you can see it.
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