Life Changes Update

I was very surprised when I realized that the one year anniversary of the divorce had come and gone without so much as a ripple in my world. I never even thought about it and when I did it was simply in passing as I went through my nightly chores.

I sat down the other day and thought about what has transpired in my life over the last year and how much it has changed. Mostly for the better, there are a few things here and there that could go and never come back but I try not to focus on them. I tried to think about life over that last 2 years and how it had changed and my life today is nothing like my life 2 years ago. There is absolutely nothing that is the same. Even the things I thought that had not changed had changed.

This does make it hard to imagine the future when I know from experience that it can all change in a matter of minutes. Nothing is permanent in this world and no one stays in your life forever. So as I sat pondering the changes in my life I wanted to think about what I have learned over the last year or two. I wanted to know if I have learned things for the better or worse. So let's look at my life as it plays out on most days.

The hardest part of this learning process was losing people I loved and people I thought loved me. The ex is not even a factor in these people, he came, he went and that is that. I no longer factor him into my learning processes, he like the ex's before him are no longer worthy of time in my life or my thoughts. So these are people that I had friendships with and in some cases spent huge amounts of time with. But, the hurt was soothed by the explanation that they came to me for a reason and that was all, nothing more. Many more will come into my life and many more will leave it just the same. I am still learning to be okay with that and remember that life is a journey and we are all on different roads. Some roads cross paths more than once and some don't, so enjoy them while you can.

Even though my life is full and busy, I have learned to enjoy the simple things that happen. I have learned that no matter how tired I am or how little sleep I got the night before, if I spend a few minutes talking to someone I love, be it my mom, Joshua, Phyllis, Gail, Harold or Jeanie my energy picks up and my spirit is full of life again. I have learned that I do not need hundreds of friends, just a few good ones are all it takes. I have discovered that sitting on the sofa on my Sunday off and watching TV is just relaxing, I have discovered that growing grass in my courtyard makes me feel very fulfilled. I have discovered that mowing the grass in my courtyard sucks and I still hate yard work.

But the simplest thing I have learned to do to bring joy and happiness back into my life is giving love and attention that was wasted in the past on undeserving people to the smallest of beings in my life. There is nothing that stops me from being home by 9pm every night. I left at intermission during Mamma Mia, I leave friends houses, I rush visitations so that I can get home to care for the critters in my life. They are on a schedule and 8:30 to 9:00 every night is when they should be experiencing their own free time. All hamsters get out of their cages every night for free time and they have come to expect this. The piggies get pets, hugs and love while the hammies are out playing. The best part is that they know who I am, they have no fear of me, they love me for who I am and they don't waver in their love.

I did learn that Sasha has not overcome her separation anxiety due to neglect from her previous owner. To counter this small setback, I let her follow me around the house for the evening. Whenever she stopped to dawdle I would call her name and she would take off after me. These are the simple things that make my life perfect.

I was surprised to realize in my little mental wanderings that I have not set down and cried in well over 18 months. I have not had a headache since I moved away from #3, I no longer get stomach aches, I no longer get that pain of fear in the pit of my stomach when I wake up and I'm alone in bed, because I know I went to bed alone and there is no one in another room being crazy. I no longer have any of the problems I had in the past. I spent from 1989 to 2007 living with unstable men, men who couldn't hold their own lives together but expected me to work miracles. With #2 I left him literally scared for my own life. With #3 I just wanted my sanity back. I still can't sleep but that is another situation all together, that existed before either of them came along.

I am happy to see that my life right now is actually normal. Well as normal as I can have. I enjoy everyday I have, I enjoy what I have, I don't sit around crying over what I don't have. I enjoy planning my little excursions and I love that I don't have anyone to take this away from me. I love that I don't have to plan my life around anyone else's life.

So this is where I am at which as far as I can tell is a much better place than I have been in a long time. I am happy that I have everyone in my life at the moment because if you are in my life then you are meant to be.

Daddy Update

Thank you to everyone of you who took time out of your busy lives to send my daddy some healing and love. As I said in an email over the weekend he suffered a heart attack on Saturday evening. Luckily he was already in the hospital, where my brother took him earlier because he was having chest pains. Upon entering the hospital they did not find anything to signal he had a heart attack nor that one was pending. But leave it up to my daddy to prove his point. Sunday morning they put more stints in two arteries and opened one more up. He still has one that is partially closed but they did not think it was necessary to mess with it. ,

As of Monday evening they moved him from ICU into his own room and were planning on releasing him either today or later this week. We all know he will be just fine because he was already complaining about everything on Monday.

To top it off during all this drama Houston was experiencing one of their famous floods. All the streets pretty much became inpassable by evening. My mother was stuck at the hospital not only by the flood but she locked her keys in the car. My sister, Debra's car was flooded and is not in the shop getting dried out. All I can say is that it is never boring in my family. There can never be just one thing going on, it always has to be several things going on.

But again, thank you all for your love and prayers not only to my daddy but to me as well. May the blessings of the Goddess shine on you all.

It's Almost Summer

Can you believe it? It is almost summer. Yes you read right, summer. And I have plans, lots and lots of plans. For the first time in a long time, I am actually going to be very busy this summer. Between my job and personal life I am going to be a busy girl.

We start with May, nothing ever happens in May. But we have Beltane which is May 1st and it is a Friday and I am off that weekend. Something will be done, I just don't know what exactly. Then we move on to May 16th & 17th. I have the cabin that weekend and on Saturday I am having friends over for a little get together and on Sunday, Harold and I are hosting a BBQ for our co workers. Then of course we have Memorial Day which once again I am off and something will happen.

Both of my parents are coming out in June with my nephews Joe and Devin. We are meeting up in Carlsbad so I can introduce my parents to Carlsbad Caverns, then I am taking them to go sledding in White Sands, after that we head to Albuquerque for some entertainment. All I know that we are doing is going to Bounce U with the boys and my parents are going to the casino.

July brings me heading to Denver for the Renaissance festival that they have every weekend from June through August. Hopefully, Josh will be able to come down and spend some time with his mother. While there I am sure I will drop in on the coven and spend some quiet time with them. Okay, that is a lie, they party more than I did as a teenager. I start my weekly Buddhist classes in Santa Fe that run all through July and into August.

Sometime between now and then I am going to go to Sedona for some shopping and meditating. That trip will hopefully include the new man. I have to introduce him to all the wildness that is my life, friends and family. He thinks he wants to meet everyone and he even says he is prepared to do so. But between, my parents, my son and my coven it may be too much of a good thing.

Sometime during the summer an old friend of mine, Brenda is coming down with her kids. I have not seen Brenda in almost 18 years. That is insane, but it will be so great to see her again. Some how or another I will find some quiet time to

Podcast

I found the transcript of a podcast I did a few years ago and I thought you guys might be interested in reading it. It will give everyone a better picture of what I do in my 5 minutes of spare time.

Welcome to our first worldwide live interview Podcast, brought to you from Pagan-Lifestyle.com,, Wiccan-Lifeststyle.com and our sister sites. My name is Maureen and I am co-owner of these websites with Marissa. Today's guest speaker is Cindy Cribbs.

Our topic is on Cindy's work with earthbound spirits and the process she utilizes to determine why they're still here and help those who wish to move into the afterlife.

Welcome to our podcast, Cindy.

1. Can you tell us about yourself?
I live in Albuquerque. I have been a Pagan since I was 14 and was introduced to Wicca by my best friends mom. My parents at the time were Catholic and later converted to Southern Baptist. As a young teen in Houston, Texas I was very conflicted with myself. I knew there had to be more to life than what I was experiencing. I knew there had to be more to my spiritual self than I was getting from the church. As I started to learn about the Pagan lifestyle I kept it hidden from everyone but my closest girlfriend whose mother was my spiritual guidance. She had a great way of teaching he Pagan way of life filling it full of love and support. Everything that I needed at that time in my young life.

As I got a bit older I started to investigate things I found interesting, things that had always been apart of me but I never acknowledged. One of those tings was the paranormal. I always felt there were unseen beings around me as a child, if I told my mother would tell me to say my prayers and go back to bed. That helped. But, the older I got I realized that none of these beings ever tried to hurt me nor did they disturb me in anyway.

When I was a young adult, I started exploring cemeteries. Any that I could find, I would wander around them for hours and based on my feelings I would go from place to place and carry on conversations, at the time I thought that were with myself. Some places I would get a really bad feeling so I would move on. Other places I would find that I was at peace and so comfortable and I would stay and chat. It was years before it dawned on me that I was not actually talking with myself but with my guides and also the spirits that dwelled in the cemetery. And this is where my “odd” life takes off.

2. When did you discover you could communicate with the world of spirit?
I was actually an adult before I realized that I could actually communicate with spirits on the other side or those who are still in our dimension. I really found out how powerful the connection was when I lived South of Houston. I lived in a house that I now know was probably a portal from one dimension to the next. Every night after I went to bed, I would hear voices in the living room. I always assumed the TV got let on, until one night I went in there and nothing was on and it was quiet as a church. I knew I had heard voices before I went in there. So on a whim I simply told them that they were welcome to hang out in my house all they wanted. However, I had to get up and go to work in the morning so if they could keep the noise down it would be great and I went back to bed. A few nights later I heard children in the living room so again, I got up and went in and asked the same thing. I told them I understood that they are children and therefore, needed toys to keep them entertained so I would leave toys in the living room for them to play with.

When I was packing my son’s room to leave, I was sitting on the floor their energy level around me was horrendous. It was dark and depressed. If you looked up you could actually see lights spinning around the ceiling. Not having experienced this before I totally went on my instinct on what to do. I sat in the middle of the room and talked to them as you would a child who was upset. I told them I understood they did not like change, neither did I, I told them that this move was not my idea but I had to leave in order to survive. I told them they were all welcome to come with me or they could stay. That would be up to them. But, I had to go.

3. When we initially spoke, you said your Spirit Guides assist you in your work. Can you share with our listeners how they help you?
My guides are a HUGE part of my life. I do nothing without consulting them first. Over time people around me have come to expect me to tell them “Let me check with the guides first” when they ask me to partake in an adventure. It is hard to describe exactly what they are because as humans we want definite answers and want to see proof. There is no proof that I can give you that they are there other than my word. My main guide is named Ziere or “Z” for short. He is used as a translator for the others as well as a go between. Most things that are given to me by the guides is a group effort not one guide doing it all. They are my spiritual team and in order for my life to function property I have to be a team player.

I have had the guides help me with everything from directions when I am lost, to checking on my son when I thought he was depressed. I have asked my guides to be with loved ones going through a hard time when I cannot be there myself.

Many people ask me if Guardian Angels are spirit guides and I believe that they are. Depending on your religious beliefs they are called many things. But they are a higher part of yourself whose only job is to help you be the best person you can be and help you reach your goals of enlightenment.

4. Can you tell us your view on life after death and how that process works?
LIFE After death is such an interesting term, since technically nothing died but your physical body. As Pagans we call it crossing over, depending on your religious viewpoint will depend on what you believe happens when the body dies.

I asked my guides to tell me in detail what happens to the soul. I wanted to know what I was sending spirits too in case I did not agree with it. My guides and I usually meet on the dream plane to work on issues, this way my body is resting but my mind can continue to work without causing any damage to me or those around me.

The other side is truly of our own making. The basic idea is the same for everyone but depending on what you consider to be paradise is what it will be like. If you are so in love with the outdoors and spend every waking moment in the woods communing with nature then your other side will resemble this.

For me, I see colors, it was beautiful peaceful place. The colors were pinks, blues, purples and whites, very muted and soft. There were birds singing in the background, butterflies flying around. And souls everywhere, they were all going about their business. Some were sitting talking, some were just relaxing. This was my picture of paradise and so this is my other side. I was told that each soul that chooses to cross over right away has an orientation to go through. This was confirmation to me, that a friend told me a few years ago when he died and then came back to talk to me. He told me about his orientation time. So I liked that I had verification, sort of my proof. They are helped through this process by their guides, their family members and other souls who’s job it is to help new comers. In between lives this is what I do, I help new souls get to where they need to be on the other side. My guides call it “soul facilitating”. Basically I am a flight attendant for the other side. I just don’t give you instructions on how to wear a seat belt. I assume you know that already. Once you have finished your orientation, you are given the opportunity to pretty much do what you want for a while. One soul I know learned to play the piano and skateboard on the other side. Others want to help certain individuals or people coming over who are new and possibly have something in common.

Since I do not follow the Christian faith, I was not told if there was a Jesus or God that you see on the other side. But, my guess would be if that is your picture of paradise then yes you will find them there.

I was not told what happens to souls who we consider evil on Earth. They are not part of my paradise so I did not think to ask where they are. My guess on that would be they are similar to people who live miserable lives here on Earth, this is their reality and so it will continue on the other side. For those who do not want to have misery in their paradise it is as if it never existed.

5. Have you ever encountered angry spirits, or other spirits that voluntarily choose to stay for awhile on the earth plane?
I have encountered angry spirits, yes. I should say that I have never encountered a “demon” or “devil” spirit. I have never been attacked by a ghost or in any other way been molested by a ghost. I was told that when a person lives angry they die angry. And this energy carries over in the after life. Here in Abq we have a restaurant (now closed) that was one of the most active haunting’s in town. The woman who haunted the restaurant lived in the house and her bedroom was literally a dining room. She loved to mess up the arranged tables, trip the wait staff and make anyone who was there terrified. When I went to the restaurant for the first time, I did all the usual things with my team, we took EMF readings, temperature reading, photos, EVP, etc. But, all I could think about was how awful it must be to love your home so much you want to stay there after death and then have it turned into a restaurant where you become a novelty. This was also one of the only places I have ever heard EVP that I immediately understood what was being said. Clear as day she said “Get Out of My House” Needless to say I honored her wishes and left.

6. What reason do they give for sticking around?
I don’t like to think of it as sticking around. Sticking around seems to imply they are stuck here and they are not stuck here. No matter what they believe. Many stay here to watch over family members, many want to see their funerals; others want to experience life on earth freely without disease or limitations. The biggest one is family. You do not lose the sense of love you have for your family simply because you cross over. But, they can get themselves and those left behind in trouble if they linger to long. For instance, when a family member passes on, everyone says “I sense him here” or “I sensed him when I went in his room” You are sensing them because they are still there. But, if the person is grieving horrendously, such as a spouse or child, their grief will be prolonged if they think that the spirit is still there. In this case, I will usually go in and talk to the spirit and explain that by hanging around and watching over the person they are in fact causing more damage. They need to move on, there is no reason why they can not check back in but their presence needs to be gone in order for the person to property grieve.

7. Do some spirits seek you out themselves, or do you only interact with them once a client contacts you with a concern?
This is an interesting question. I am sure there are some who do seek me out, they know from your vibration if you are able to see or hear them. So they will naturally go to that vibration. However, I taught myself not to recognize spirits unless I specifically ask them to be there. This protects me from being bombarded by ghosts who want to talk. It also protects me from their energy when I am not able to do so myself.

8. Will you explain to us what the process involves once you have made contact?
Making contact is not a definite thing. You can request to make contact; you can let them know that you are willing to make contact. But, if they are not interested or do not want to communicate they won’t do it. Some are already in the orientation process on the other side and do not want to come back. Others are in a process of healing from their own experiences and do not want to make contact. My grandmother told me a week before she died that she would not be back to talk to me because she had other things to do on the other side and did not have time to come back. She did come back briefly to tell a physic friend of mine that I did not need to go to her funeral in Florida the week after Christmas because she just saw me. I have not seen nor heard from her since she died December 21, 2003.

9. Can you share with us some of the experiences you have had with spirits and how the encounters ended?
Many experiences are just confused spirits that need a bit of guidance. If they died quickly and unexpectedly there is a moment of confusion. If I happen to be in the area and they lock onto my vibration, I will simply and quietly explain what happened to them, and ask them what they are experiencing and go with that.

One place I lived in Abq had a woman that haunted the house. I was so used to not noticing them that the only time I knew when one was getting annoying was because my husband would mention it. If he noticed them, then they were trying very hard to make themselves known. He called me at work and told me he thought I needed to do a clearing in the bedroom because there was a different energy there and he was not able to sleep. So I talked to a friend of mine to see if she could pick up anything on the spirit in my room before I went in. She told me that the spirit had a connection to the house not me. And she was there because she had fond memories of being there during the holidays.

So I went home and sat in my bedroom. I asked the spirit why there were there, I asked if should could cross to the other side. She said she was there because she wanted to be and that yes she could cross back at any time. So this was good news for me, I told her that I appreciated her stopping by and visiting, but the memories she had in my house were no longer there. Those people no longer lived in the house. I told her that we would be gone for the holidays and no would be there at all. I told her that she had so many friends and family on the other side that were waiting for her to come back and spend the holidays with them. It took a few more minutes to just explain that what she was looking for no longer existed on this plain and she needed to look for it on the other side. She left and never came back. To me this was successful, it ended on a good note and everyone involved was happy.

10. Do you charge for your services?
I get asked this a lot. I know there are people out there who make their living by talking to spirits on the other side. I do not choose to do this. In order for me to be the next Sylvia Brown or John Edward, I would have to devote my entire life to this gift and I am not willing to do that. I respect them for their abilities to help people in such huge numbers, but for me that is not the life I want to live nor is it the life my guides want me to live.

I do not charge to help people if I can. I offer no guarantees on either being able to communicate with their loved ones nor helping them to connect with them. I would rather offer them guidance on how they can communicate with their loved ones. It is more powerful and special if they themselves learn to do it than have someone they may doubt do it. I am always open if someone wants to trade for services.

I have several friends who are artists and they trade their art for my help and it works out to benefit us all. Kind of like the country doctor who gets paid in chickens instead of money.

11. Tell us how our listeners can reach you if they believe a loved one is earthbound and needs your help to move on?
If anyone wants to reach me they can email me at cynthiacribbs@yahoo.com

Thank you so much Cindy, for speaking with us today. It is comforting to know that there is help for our loved ones in spirit who wish to cross over, but can't do it alone. I'm sure it is also helpful for their loves ones remaining in our world to know the reasons why they choose to stay if that is their wish, as well.

This concludes our podcast brought to you by pagan-lifestyle.com,wiccan-lifestyle.com and our sister sites. We hope you have enjoyed this podcast.

Blessings,

Maureen and Marissa

P.S. If you want to accept calls from listeners, we can incorporate that invitation into the list of questions, of course, but that is your decision. If you want to add or change any of these questions, please feel free to do so and send me the revised Q and A's. Once you complete the answers, email them to me.

Soul Retrieval

Way back on October 16, 2007 I wrote a post called "Unchain My Heart." This post was about cutting the spiritual cords between ourselves and anyone we had a relationship in the past. One of the things that many of us forget is that by being in love with someone we attach ourselves to that person. We give bits and pieces of ourselves to that person that we never get back. You may be surprised to find out that this does not only happen to people you have an intimate relationship with but, your family and friends as well.

As humans we are designed to be loving and caring people. We give of ourselves to each other to help them through rough times and to offer comfort whenever it is needed. We stand by each other through thick and thin. It is part of the human DNA. But, on the flip side we never take back what was not intended to be a permanent loan, our soul.

Since #3 and I separated 2 years ago I knew I needed to do a soul retrieval and I have being meaning to do it. But, if you know me you also know I do not like to deal with anything that is yucky. I would rather put it off for as long as possible even forever if I can. Z and the boys had other ideas. A few weeks ago when I was having my routine therapy session, my therapist asked me if I had done a soul retrieval with #3 and if I had taken back my soul from him. I have to admit I was ashamed to say no. She however, was not ashamed to bitch at me. In our world this is just part of the divorce. You have no reason not to do it, it has to be done. But, I did have a reason and I told her. I do not want any part of his spiritual terrorism in my house or in my vibrational field. The idea of communicating with him on the spiritual level is horrifying to me. He has not been civil to me in years why would his spirit...the essence of his being be any different?

I did agree that I would conduct the soul retrieval in her office, with the protection of her and a few of my spiritual protectors around me as well as my guides. The day came last week for me to go through with the process but I could not do it. I sat in her office and told her I could not do it. She was concerned that I was not ready to let go of him but I told her that was not it. I was absolutely petrified of his energy. His energy scares the hell out of me and I don't know if I could handle it. I have lived in pretty much peace and quiet for 2 years now, I no longer know how to handle complete chaos and hate. That is all he has for me, chaos and hate. I told her I can't imagine how disruptive it would be to my life if he was to enter into it again.

So we have come to an agreement between me, my therapist and the guides. They are going to work for the next several weeks on putting protection around me. I have been working on a binding ritual that will protect my spirit from his spirit. Even though my house is warded to the nines I am going to do more warding to keep it protected from anything negative that may wander by and then we have set a date to do the retrieval, which will be done in a neutral place and on a neutral plane so that I will not feel threatened. The good part about it is that it is completely one sided so I never have to do anything with him. He is not part of this ritual he is simply an object of it.

Wish me luck and let's hope it is as easy as we think it will be.

Social Networks

In case you want to find me I am on facebook, myspace and twitter. I prefer facebook if you have not created an account do it. It is fun to keep up with people, post pictures and comment on what everyone is doing.

Oh Boy

I am going to start this entry with a confirmation to many of you who have emailed me and asked questions and wanted to know when I was going to write about it. So let's start off by answering the hot question of the day, the question that I have been asked over and over the last few days. Yes, I am seeing someone. I did not want to do more than just say I was going on a date with someone because I did not want to jinx anything. It has taken me 2 years to actually look at man in a romantic way. But that is how I look at him and think of him. I am not going to give all my secrets away about him other than to say that he is coven approved and definitely guide approved or there would be no relationship.

I will be honest with you all, I was and still am scared to death with this new relationship. He is wonderful and perfect for me. He knows all about my religion and is very interested in learning more. He is slowly getting to know the quirky side of me and seems to be okay with it. He has a wonderful sense of humor, he is very caring and compassionate. And to top it off when he touches me (not intimately, we have not gotten there yet) I welcome it instead of reject it. When he put his arms around me it was pure heaven, I felt safe and so comfortable. An odd feeling for me.

It took a lot of counseling from my HP and the guides before I would admit that I liked him. I was so afraid that there was something wrong or that something would go wrong and I would be hurt all over again. Both said the same thing "He is not #3." When I talked to Z about him he gave me some insight into the relationship and advised me to stay unattached and not to allow myself off of my path to enlightenment. Since I have a tendency to put relationships ahead of my own enlightenment Z was concerned I would do this again. I have assured him I would not wander off the path again. Z also reminded me that I was not lead into the relationship with #3 by my guides. #3 believes "spirit" brought us together and in the beginning I agreed with that. But, Z reminded me that they would not lead me into something that would only cause pain in the end. #3's guides may have lead him into the relationship but I was not lead there. I simply went into the relationship to get out of Houston. I did remind them that in the beginning it was nice and I did enjoy the traveling and the fun I had. Of course, they reminded me that in the beginning he was not being true to himself and was putting on a fake persona. The end was his true persona and it was not a nice persona.

Either way, I am hoping that my new relationship, which I am taking extremely slow will work out and be a great adventure. He is exactly what my astrologer said I needed a fellow workaholic. His schedule is more crazy than my schedule but it is what I need, I can't rush into anything if we are both working. As always I will keep everyone updated on this new development.

Get Well Soon Brother

I want to send out lots of love and light and energy to my brother, Jeremiah. He had surgery again yesterday in hope of helping with his Crohn's disease. This time they removed several inches of his intestines and hope this will give him some relief from the pain.

I love you Jerry more than I probably tell you. Hang in there. I am sending healing to you as I write.

Ode to Harrison

April 4, 1988 was the day one of the most important people I have ever known was born on. Harrison was born on April 4th and I did not know him until October of 2003. I met Harrison and his mom Deb, through ghost hunting. Harry and I hit it off right away, he was so like Joshua in so many ways. I missed Josh desperately and was having serious empty nest syndrome. Harry had the best since of humor I have ever experienced, he was like a soul mate to me. No matter what crazy wild ideas I came up with Harry was right there to laugh his ass off as we did it. During my time with Harry we had some wild adventures and I loved nothing more than to see that look of pure horror on his face that only a teenager can accomplish when they get way too much information. Let me share of my most treasured memories of Harry.

1. One of his first duties in the ghost hunting groups was to be zombie in the Day of the Dead tour. He was actually amazingly good as was his mother, Deb. This explained so much about them.
2. Ghosting hunting at Ft. Craig in the middle of the night and me asking Harry how do you get a bunch of old military ghosts to come out? Harry’s response “Take your shirt off.”
3. Spending my birthday in El Paso ghost hunting and Harry and I took a midnight trip to Target. They had these pillowcases that look just like a pair of panties I had as a little girl. I had to buy them after I saw that horrible look on his face. I still have the pillowcases.
4. All the many conversations about everything with Harry.
5. The excitement he had on his face when he was showing me pictures of his trip to Ireland.
6. Trying to talk him into standing on the wall around the church in Old Town during the Christmas festival and yelling "All Hail Satan's High Holy Day". He almost did it until he saw the news cameras and was afraid his mom would see him on TV.
7. Having him posing on the ruins at Ft. Craig while I took pictures. Only realize later that it was a federal offense to climb on the ruins. I had no idea, but he was thrilled that he committed a federal offense.
8. Rolling our eyes while we listened in the backseat to his mom and #3 talking about all the weird things we did not understand.

After Harry’s death, we got even closer. He haunted the hell out of my house. He brought so much joy to so many people’s lives and I miss him everyday. But I also know that Harry is doing lots of work on the other side and it is all for the good of other kids. But, I still wish he would visit a little more often. So as I always sign off with Harry. Happy Haunting, You keep me in your haunting and I will keep you in mine.

Enlightenment is On The Way

I have been listening to Deepak Chopra's book "Buddha: A Story of Enlightenment" and I have too say it is a great book. I am truly enjoying this story of the life of Buddha from the time before his birth.

In the book, Deepak talks about Buddha (who's name was Siddhartha) who was born a Prince. His mother died shortly after his birth. The astrologer's of the time saw in his life chart that he would rule the world but not his father's kingdom. In order to keep his son close by and to have him as his heir his father was advised to close Buddha's life off to anything outside the palace walls. But, even in this secluded life Buddha started the path to his enlightenment as a toddler. He would acknowledged voices he heard but would not see anyone around. He recognized his feelings towards animals, nature and people in general. As a youngster he was able to see past the events unfolding in front of him and know how they would turn out. Not because he could see the future but because he could see the the real person within the person. He could tell good from evil by their spirit within.

One thing that I found interesting was the pain and anguish he felt for the smallest of beings. He felt sadness over the worms cut in half when the fields were tilled. This evening as I was in the shower I noticed a fly on the wall and without even thinking about it is sprayed it off the wall and down the drain. Once the fly was gone and down the drain, I actually stopped and thought "what have I done?" I was shocked to realize I just killed a living being without a second thought. I felt such remorse for that one action. I finished my shower and as I was drying off and putting on my robe the guides ever so gently said "You are finally on the road to true enlightenment. Congratulations."

My feelings of remorse were then replaced with first happiness and then trepidation. I thought I was on the road to enlightenment all along but apparently you have to experience and realize many things before the road truly opens up.