The last few weeks have been a true emotional roller coaster for me. One minute I am ready to kill anyone who looks at me wrong the next minute I am crying about something I remembered from 20 years ago. Today was just right down weird, it was truly the pinnacle of my emotional craziness.
A few weeks ago I was so angry at everyone for everything. There was not one specific thing that started my anger but it was very confusing and actually a bit frightening to me. I was actually afraid to work with certain people because of my mood and what I might say or do. My mood was so explosive that I actually drank alcohol in the middle of the day to try and see if that would help my mood. It didn't, it just gave me a headache from hell that evening. It seems no matter how hard I try to get drunk, it just is not possible. Yeah Me.
The anger left as quickly as it came and in it's place it left the feeling of loss and heart ache. Personally I preferred the anger at least I know how to deal with that. For the next several days I would well up at the drop of a hat, I had dreams that made no sense to me at all, I had problems figuring out where I was in life and what I wanted out of it. The guides advice was to ride it out, it was all happening for a reason. Again Yeah Me.
So I am hoping this week is a mellow week with less emotions. I have two parties this week, French's is Tuesday night at the Marriott with my holiday date, Phyllis. RPI's is Thursday starting with shopping in Old Town, dinner at St. Claire Winery and Bistro and then I get to give them all a ghost tour of Old Town, I figure they will be so drunk by that point I can just take them in an alley and leave them. So maybe by partying all week my mood will stay in a good place. We will see.
Posted by
Cynthia