I can officially say that I am sick and tired of the dating charade. You meet someone and you talk and share things about yourself and to me is seems so tiring. With me I have one huge set back already against me. Many people would think that it is I don't want kids, I already have a kid, I have been married several times, but it is none of these things. My faux pas is that I am not a christian. I do not hide this on my profile nor do I hide this when I am asked. I am not ashamed of not being christian. I am proud of my way of life and the way I have chosen or not chosen to worship.
What annoys me is most christians claim to be compassionate and loving people. Living the way of Jesus. In all my religious education I do not recall Jesus turning his back on those who did not follow his ways. In fact if I recall correctly he welcomed and embraced those who were different from him. Yet as soon as his followers find out I am not Team Jesus they treat me like I am a pedophile mass murder. This is not all christians that I know. I know several of them that did not know my religious preference until years after knowing me. But, it did not change their feelings for me. They just stopped inviting me to church.
I have friends who are Jewish when they find out I am not christian and I am not Jewish most of them have either asked questions or said "Good for you" but not christians. They want to "bring me back to Jesus." I don't want to be brought back to Jesus, I did not leave Jesus, I was never there to start with. I was what my parents said I was not what I wanted to be. As soon as I was able to learn on my own I found my own path and I have embraced it for 25 years now.
When Joshua was a child he actually went to religious private school. Not because I wanted him to be religious but because private schools in Texas are only run by the churches. You did not have a choice. Joshua started questioning religion when he was 7 years old. Being a non-chrisitian I was able to answer his questions to the best of MY ability not my pastors ability. I allowed him to pick his own path to go down. In his 21 years he has been down many paths, he has been Catholic, Jehovah Witness, Agnostic and now he considers himself a Pagan. But it was his choice, I encouraged him to try every religion out there so he could make an educated decision about what he believed and did not believe.
So why is this bothering me? Because I met this really nice guy. I did not know a lot about him but I really liked him and he claimed to really like me. I flat out asked him in the beginning "What was it about my profile that you liked?" Is response was "Your very pretty and you don't have small kids." Over the course of our conversation he mentioned church here and there. I really did not think about it. He is very family oriented which I liked. But, something was bothering me and it was bothering me so much that I actually could not sleep. What bothered me was he was assuming I was a good christian girl and that I went to some church here in town.
I spent some serious time considering if I would allow myself to go back in the broom closet for a man. I did this most of my life, it was not until I left Texas I would openly tell people I did not know that I was a pagan. I did not open a conversation with it, but if I was asked I would tell people and I still do. After thinking for a bit, I realized that no I would never deny myself one of our constitutional rights Freedom of Worship. Not to mention, my faith is a big part of who I am it is not just something I do on Halloween. I do this 365 days a year. Besides how would I hide the fact that I meditate twice a day and I have very active ghosts living in my house. Hell, if i ignore them they toss things at me. So these were just simple things. How do I explain the coven, my friends and my altar?
Based on my internal conversation with myself I decided to let him know before this went any farther. So I shot off an email to him this afternoon and you could hear the iron wall crash down with a resounding silence to follow. This person who for that past week has emailed me 20 times a day, text messaged me, sent photos, etc. stopped all communication. The kicker he does not know what I am. He only knows I am not a christian. I did not give him a religion I just said I was not a christian.
Personally if this is how the single christian men are I will pass. Because my thought is if they are this judgemental before they even really know you what are they like when they do. I have already lived with 2 extremely judgemental men and I don't need anymore.